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HooLeeO's blog: "Are these funny?"

created on 07/07/2009  |  http://fubar.com/are-these-funny/b302835

Ouch

If you were to lay every vein, artery and capillary in a humans body end to end, that person would probably die..

Ole and Lena

Ole, out in his pasture in northern Minnesota,
Takes a lightning-quick kick from a cow right in the crotch.
Writhing in agony, he falls to the ground.
 
As soon as he could manage, he took himself to the doctor He said
'How bad is it Doc? 
I'm going on my honeymoon next veek and my fiance, Lena, is still a 
Virgin - in  every vay'.
 
The doctor told him, 'I'll have to put your willy in a 
Splint to let it heal, and keep it straight. It should be okay next week.
He took four tongue depressors, and formed a neat little 4 sided splint,
And taped it all together . 
Quite an impressive work of art.
 
Ole mentions none of this to Lena , marries her, and they go 
On their honeymoon to Duluth     ..
 
That night in the motel room, Lena rips open her blouse to 
Reveal her beautiful, untouched breasts.
She said, 'You're the first vun.
 No vun has EVER seen deez.'
 
Ole immediately drops his pants and replies,
'Look at dis, ....still in DA CRATE
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