Like an alcoholic craves a drink
A smoker nicotine
So I crave his energies, his essence
But going to him tonight for help, indebting myself
Firmly and finally, I had taken that first drink,
Fed the waiting addiction
I can barely resist his simple draw
So captivating is he that I can't get him out of my head
I feel his nearness, even without his touch
Such temptation, so vibrant in its allure
He threatens my constant concentration
I couldn't handle his rejection so I keep myself locked away
But inside he makes me feel adventurous, attractive, alive
I feel dizzy with awareness every time I see him
His aloofness increases my own, until we are just polite strangers
When I look into his eyes, I'm bewitched
Whenever I hear him speak, I'm seduced
His essence is overwhelming, it nearly consumes me
dDsire, desperate carnal desire, bursts over me,
Sudden and immediate, like a crash of thunder
Or a strike of lightning, never hitting the same spot twice
I feel electric whenever he's near but deadened once he's gone
I willingly take another sip of this intoxicating thrill
I let the fascination take over and control me
I could only hope to be strong enough to overcome this addiction
But my weakness, I fear, will allow temptation to overwhelm me
Is this obsessed fixation just a sign of my inevitable dissension into insanity?
Should I view this obsession as too much emotional attachment?
Or is this link between him and I so strong that denying it would be futile?
The force of my emotions compels me to confess my feelings but I restrain myself
I have so much to say but no way to say it, no way to convey this internal conflict
What might amount to nothing means absolutely everything to me
Do I profess my true feelings or do I keep them locked inside?
Should I stay and fight for what I want or should I leave the possibility of despair behind me?
I don't know who I'm asking, just trying to find answers in a world full of questions
I feel so alone in this turmoil, someone please send some life-saving salvation
As I muddle through the chaos inside my head, trying to make my way though the confusion
I become aware of the dangers of such self-examination
Such an in-depth look into my psyche is hazardous
And as I journey through the treacherous path of self-doubt
My balance is precarious, I could slip into the tragic abyss at any moment
