A man goes to the confessional. "Forgive me father, for I have
> sinned."
>
> "What is your sin, my child?" The priest asks back.
>
> "Well," the man starts, "I used some horrible language this week and I
> feel absolutely terrible."
>
> "When did you do use this awful language?" Said the priest.
>
> "I was golfing and hit an incredible drive that looked like it was
> going to go over 250 yards, but it struck a phone line that was
> hanging over the fairway and fell straight down to the ground after
> going only about 100 yards."
>
> "Is that when you swore?"
>
> "No, Father." Said the man. "After that, a squirrel ran out of the
> bushes and grabbed my ball in his mouth and began to run away."
>
> "Is THAT when you swore?" Asked the priest again.
>
> "Well, no," said the man, "You see, as the squirrel was running, an
> eagle came down out of the sky, grabbed the squirrel in his talons and
> began to fly away!"
>
> "Is THAT when you swore?" Asked the amazed priest.
>
> "No, not yet." The man replied. "As the eagle carried the squirrel
> away in his claws, it flew towards the green. And as it passed over a
> bit of forest near the green, the squirrel dropped my ball."
>
> "Did you swear THEN?" Asked the now impatient priest.
>
> "No, because as the ball fell it struck a tree, bounced through some
> bushes, careened off a big rock, and rolled through a sand trap onto
> the green and stopped within six inches of the hole."
>
> "You missed the %#$*& putt, didn't you?" Sighed the priest.