Six months ago today, the other half of me went to meet his Savior. He was tired... he'd fought very hard to stay on this earth as long as possible, but the cancer won. He'd been told on October 6th of last year that he had 3 to 6 months to live. He went through two clinical trials and radiation to try and slow it down. He said he had to try them because every day that he fought the cancer was another day that he got to spend with me.
We worked as a team to keep him strong for as long as we could, but the cancer was evil... stole his appetite, stole his strength, stole his laughter, and stole his life... Our life.
We had a rare relationship. We shared such a generosity of spirit that people could feel the love we shared when we entered a room together. We even had strangers remark about how obvious it was that we were just crazy about each other.
We did everything together, and now that he's gone there is a huge void in my life. There is nothing I can do or see or taste or touch or feel that doesn't bring a flood of memories raining down on me.
So today marks 6 months that I've lived without him by my side. I don't like it one bit. There are so many times where I just NEED him here, and cry because he never will be at my side on this earth again.
I do have the hope of seeing him again, and I'm doing all of the things I promised him I would.. going to school.. taking care of myself and our kids and grandbabies... but most of the time it feels like I'm just going through the motions.
If you get a chance listen to the songs on my page. To Where You Are by Josh Groban and Homesick by Mercy Me. They say a lot about how I'm feeling... and how I've felt...since the other half of me died... 6 months ago today.
