Ten years later and so much has changed. I think about the things that my dad is missing out on. His first grandaughter is married and a teacher. His other is now a nurse and still as stubborn and beautiful as ever. Little Michael is no longer his little great grandson, but a girl crazy, sports fanatic teenager with peach fuzz. I could go on and on here.
I have never popped the hood of the car without looking over my shoulder. I can feel him watching to see if I remember how check the fluids in mycar. I tear up sometimes when I pass up a primer car. lol His idea of my first car was an El Camino and mine was a 69 camero. Neither of us won that argument lol. Our project became a 1986 Mustang. It arrived in 4 different colors and I got my first lessons in stripping paint off my car. And then transmission, etc. lol I miss having my talks with him about life. I can't say they were life changing talks, but I always laughed at how he called Smoltz...Smokey and Chipper Jones...Chippy. lol I am rambling.
I did keep something. I kept an old rag that he kept in his pocket to whip his hands and the last empty pack of his viceroy cigarettes. I keep them in a zip lock bag. I haven't opened it in 10 years. Well today, I did. I must say it brought tears to my eyes to smell that mixture of old spice and viceroy cigarettes. It felt like he walked in the room. I was waiting to hear a crazy joke or him tell me my car needed oil.
No matter what tomorrow holds and how imperfect my dad may have been. I am glad that he did finally tell me he loved me before he died. Very comforting to know that he did. :)
Good feeling to know that he could still be watching over me. RIP Pop I wouldn't have asked for a better dad.
