As I stare now into glory I seek to conquer all. I’m sick. I know I’m not well because to look into my heart is to take a journey into hell. I’ve done things that I’ll never tell. I have been broken battered and defeated. The blood may no longer run like a river but the pain is here to tell me that I’m still alive. I’ve been guilty of judging to quickly and I have paid the price. I’ve been addicted to substance and punishment and they got me no where but trapped within my own empathy. Now I must face my bruised reflection daily. Just because I am bruised does not mean that I will bow down and I will give in…..I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…the pain is here to show me that I’m still alive…Every drop of blood and sweat has it’s own meaning. I live for the pain I do not care what you think what you say…I don’t give a fuck that people stare at me every day. My blood shall flow and it will stain the land for I am one who is to be judged….when that day comes the real horrors will reveal themselves no longer with anything be concealed. I’ve been eaten alive by my horrors but I confront them every day to survive…I don’t need to smile. Every breath I can steal, every day I can complete sin or no sin is it’s own gift. I have become empowered through my own integrity. There are those that die so that I can live. That it is why I seek to decimate all un-certainty and push myself to the threshold. My mission for the day is to stare death in the face and come back for more. The dark angel holds the keys to my gate…I cannot yet gain admittance for I have not yet conquered myself. I am exposed in my brokenness and impurity for all of the world to see....In this world there are those who seek to cause my crushing defeat….I spit venom in there face. I scream these words for all to hear “Loneliness it not a phase….in a field of pain is where my soul is to graze….serenity is far away.” For serenity to be obtained a new life must begin. For a new life to begin, one must die…..I will destroy everything….I will obliterate everything that threatens me….I will cast down my enemy for he seeks to oppose me. I will embrace the destruction. I will destroy any empty threat. I will not forget that I have the power and fury within to obliterate all that makes me weak. I will stare into death’s face….I will travel to hell again and again to never forgetting the most truth.
