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The male patient asked that the nurse not laugh at his ‘problem’. Of course I won't laugh, said the nurse. I'm a professional. In over twenty
years I've never laughed at a patient.'
'Okay then,' said Jim, and he proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest 'man thingy' the nurse had ever seen. Length and width, it couldn't have been bigger than a AAA battery. Unable to control herself, the nurse started giggling, then fell to the floor laughing. Ten minutes later, she was able to struggle to her feet and regain her composure.
I am so sorry, she said. I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a nurse and a lady, I promise it won't happen again. Now, tell me, what seems to be the problem?
'It's swollen,' Jim replied.
She ran out of the room.
This guy is walking on the beach somewhere in California. He sees a lamp, rubs it, and a Genie comes out. The genie is so happy that he decides to grant one wish to the lucky guy.
The guy thinks about it and says, "I'd like you to build a highway to Hawaii because I am afraid to fly. The genie responds that this can't be done because it would be technologically impossible considering the depth of the ocean and the distance to Hawaii. So he asks the guy to wish for something else.
The guy thinks about it and, very enthusiastically, wishes he would understand women.
The genie than said, "Do you want your highway to have 2 or 4 lanes?"
Joke of the Day
Two men were having an awfully slow round of golf because the two ladies in front of them managed to get into every sand trap, lake, and rough on the course. They didn't bother to wave the men on through, which is proper golf etiquette.
After two hours of waiting and waiting, one man said, "I think I'll walk up there and ask those gals to let us play through."
He walked out the fairway, got halfway to the ladies, stopped, turned around, and came back, explaining, "I can't do it. One of those women is my wife and the other is my mistress! Maybe you'd better go talk to them."
The second man walked toward the ladies, got halfway there and, just as his partner had done, stopped, turned around and walked back and said: "Small world."
http://www.fubar.com/user/45665
this asshole scammed me out of 6 mil , dont trust the scaumbag
->╚»BÌG·ÐÁÐÐ...: ok swent over 6 mil for 11
╚»BÌG·ÐÁÐÐ...: yeah
->╚»BÌG·ÐÁÐÐ...: do you still wanna trade?
»BÌG·ÐÁÐÐ...: after i get the payment, sure.
->╚»BÌG·ÐÁÐÐ...: hmmmm can you give it to my #1 fam ill pay you from that account
╚»BÌG·ÐÁÐÐ...: i'll give you a cherry bomb or auto 11 for 6 mill fubucks.
Jade H: ->╚»BÌG·ÐÁÐÐ...: ok swent over 6 mil for 11
╚»BÌG·ÐÁÐÐ...: yeah
->╚»BÌG·ÐÁÐÐ...: do you still wanna trade?
»BÌG·ÐÁÐÐ...: after i get the payment, sure.
->╚»BÌG·ÐÁÐÐ...: hmmmm can you give it to my #1 fam ill pay you from that account
╚»BÌG·ÐÁÐÐ...: i'll give you a cherry bomb or auto 11 for 6 mill fubucks.
A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana.
She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!"
The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!"
Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator. Later in the day, the shopkeeper is driving home, When he spots the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then,he sees a huge 12 foot alligator swimming quickly toward her.
She takes aim, kills the creature and with a great deal of effort hauls it On to the swamp bank. Laying nearby were several more of the dead creatures.
The shopkeeper watches in amazement. Just then the blonde flips the alligator on it's back, and frustrated, shouts out, "Darn it, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!"
