I aint been on here since october since my aunt died which ever since i aint been the same. Ive been more depressed since shes left than I ve ever been in my life. I used to go to bars with her and she was always the one to buy drinks even for a stranger thats just how she was. I miss her everyday more and more this christmas with out her didnt seem the same and the rest never will. Every day I go through life wondering if I even want to go on with my life alot of the time I dont. Unfortunately I do. I have thoughts going through my head of close family members Ive lost and thoughts of the women who have crushed my heart and it gets to me Im the type of guy who doesnt have the balls to let that shit go cuz when u fall in love and the women crushes ur heart u lose ur mind and it hurts and the pain never goes away. Us guys just want to know why? Why do u crush are hearts when we put everything into these relationships love u with all are heart then all of a sudden u dont want nothing to do with us? Guess it just sucks having a good heart thats abused. I sit here and talk about suicide everyday but never do it cuz I aint got the ballz but when u lose somebody whether its a relative or some one u fall in love with some of those gurls just dont get it. Some times i wonder if suicides calling my name i swear it is one of these days i mite just cave in and say fuck it. All im saying is for u ladies out there dont crush are hearts therevaluable and once we give them to you for us theres no looking back.
alec serr
(aka Deathangel)
