I've noticed something crutial to my development as a human being: I keep falling in love only to be let down. Adam was the catalyst to this thought, but I started thinking back, and realized the same thing happened with James and with Chuck. Adam was going to marry me... he and I arrived at the courthouse 2 hours too early, then, suddenly, he stopped loving me. James gave me a ring as well, then told me I was being too clingy. Granted, the break up with James was completely my stupid misunderstanding, but the bottom line is: it happened there too. Chuck actually did marry me, then I was too much for him to handle.
Maybe, it's me? Maybe, I need to be single for a little bit... or to think things through. I hate that I can't open up and let someone love me. I hate that I can't let myself be vulnerable again. Maybe, I'm just scared... Maybe, I'm just scarred? Who knows?
I'm wondering who I am,
~Carissa
