thoughts
to those that know me, and the ones that think they know me....
i don't want to go on living a lie.
i am not happy or content...not even a little bit glad aoubt somethings in my past however, the one thing i can be certin about myself is that i have a open heart.
granted i wear it on my sleave at times and holding it close at others, even giving it fully to another i just can't find anyone to take it from me
this is in no way shape or form a plee for love just a way for me to express everything on my mind as the tears fill my eyes untill i can no longer see these keys,least not i whipe them away
this is my soul(if you beleive in it the way i do)no covers no fillers just raw open me
telling the world that i know (aka my readers) the i ity anyone with the emotional weakness lesser than mine i do amaze myself as to how far i can go most days what with all the regrets...lost momwnets and word that should have been said but my cowardness would never let slip.
for those of you that think of me as a quote unquote "pimp, player, man whore ect...) its all a cover for the heart i hold so dear to myself.
there are times when i just want to wrap my arms around a person and tell them that my heart is there if only they ask for it, but i know that this is nolonger the time for that
i guess you could say i have a old soul i am infact more tridistional in the department of love kinda the wine and roses type and well women fear that now for a reason unknown to me
i just feel so lost when i am not emotionally attached to anyone i almost "need" that feeling to function
take this for what it is if your reading this anyone i have not and will not point out people or say names but if you know that i might be talking about somthing dealing with you please i beg you let the moment pass... tho just typeing that saddens me i know that we are not going to be with one another
(the sad thing is that this is directed to noone yet a few of you will see me talking to you here)
forgive me please i know that this world will swallow a person with these thoughts whole and spit them out like it was just a glimmer in the long span of time however these are in fact my words and from my heart to the curuit board i place them unto everlasting memory so as i nor you shall forget them in whole
i can admit to the fact that i am a very impresional person and this is brought to my attention from watching and beeing deeply moved by the hollywood flims that scroll acrossed the tv screen and i know that its just for entertainment but is it really substandered to think that maybe just maybe somethings where a message to you guiding you in a mystic sort of way on a road predeterminded by fate leave you only with the forks in the road
friends strangers and stalkers.(have to thorw in a joke)
fairwell to you this morning i open my eyes from this restfullness and i shall be ...
a more at peace with myself
good night, good luck, and if you have anything you wish for me to know
please just tell me hold nothing back...life is to short for anyone to waste time .... .....waiting
