x YUMz x's blog: "Thoughts..words"

Heaven Sent Me Here Today So0o That I Could Make Your Everyday A Brighter One God Told Me To Look Over You And Make Sure You Stayed Out Of Trouble...My Job In Life Is To Make You Laugh And I Have...And I Have Made Your Everyday A Brighter One...Nobody Ever Said Life Was Going To Be Easy...But Now Know That When I Am By Your Side Life Will Be A Little Easier On You...Because I Will Guide You Through All The Bad Times And I Will Help You Over All The Bumps...I Will Never Let You Stumble...Even In Your Bad Times I Will Have A Smile Upon My Face... A Smile That Will Bring Maybe A Laugh Or Maybe A Smirk...If A Tear Falls From Your Eyes I Will Make Sure That They Are Tears Of Happieness Not Tears Of Sadness...Just Remember That No Matter What I Will Always Be There For You... I Am Your Angel Sent From Above You Just Can't See My Wings

I was sent to you...But I never knew that god had sent me my own "Angel". You are my "Angel" and even better you are my best friend. You were there for me when they hurt me... You never left me on my own...You were the one who helped me when I needed the help, but never asked for...I never knew god had answered my pray when I asked him to send me an "Angel". He did and he gave me something in life that will always stay with me. He sent me you. I thought when I met you, that you were only a friend. The ones that just stay with you in High School. But I was wrong your what the true meaning of "Best Friends" means... You know that I will always be there for you....Thank you for being my "Angel" just like I have been yours.

His life is hard, but no one ever told him it was going to be easy. He met a girl she broke his heart, made him go crazy, made him think that life was nothing. He thought about death, but that didn't work, he couldn't help but think that his life was just nothing. His mother may not have made it a point to tell him she cared, but you knew that she did. And even if she didn't, he still had his other family. The one he knew with no doubt in his mind that they loved him. They were always there for him, but when he needed them most he never asked for help. He just went crazy not having a care in the world. And then he was gone never to be seen again.

I sit here -N- I hear the screaming in my head. I wounder why they look at me this way? I'm not the one who looks like everyone around me like them. I look different isn't that good, why do they have to look at me so? I just wanna run away, get away from the eyes that stare...I just can't take the stares. It's as if I did something bad, I feel like a little girl again that has been caught and everyone stares at her. But no matter where I go, I can still hear what they say, I can still feel theres eyes on me. My head hurts, I can hear myself screaming on the inside. God please make them stop can't they see they are hurting me... I know i've done nothing wrong why can't it be them. Why can't they be stared at...I know im better then them...why do I have to feel the pain...I don't laugh and stare at other that aren't like me..I have feelings, I know what it's like. But they can't god please let see they can be better then this.

My heart broke into a million little pieces the day you left, I came home from a really bad day at my job and i wanted to come home and say sorry... but when i came home and u were gone... no letter no good byes nothing... i sat in my room that night well mom and dad talked to the cops and cried... i lost my Best Friend and my Sister that night... I wish u would come home Stephanie...Just so i could say sorry....My heart breaks into millions of little pieces and this time your not here to help me pick them back up.. im alone with out my friend.. i love you Stephanie AA4E!!!!!!

When times got rough, you were always there for me. When I needed a shoulder to cry on, yours was always there. Now im walking around looking for you, and knowing that things will never be the same. Even though you aren`t here I can still feel you here with me. I can walk into a room and smell your perfume, and smiling knowing your there. I drive on to the LIE and stop and laugh, and think of how much it embarrassed us, when you would stop for on coming traffic. It's those small things that made life so much fun, It was you not caring what anyone thought, That gave me the courage to move on. To not forget but except things the way they are. I still get in the car and head to you when things are so rough. And i still cry knowing that no ones there. But then I smile an think "she's there". You will always be there, In the wind, In the stars, In the chirping of the birds. In a funny story. You will be everywhere and anywhere, but most of all, you will forever be in my heart. Rest In Peace Catherine A Ayers January 29, 1936 September 28, 2007

You ever wonder who your true friends are? The ones that no matter what happens will always be there for you. I thought thats what you were. But in the end the joke was on me. You walked on me you used me for when you needed things and then you hurt me. And every time i let you back into my life. Im tired of being walked on tired of being hurt JUST so damn tired of feeling used. You always talk about how we are the best of friends, how i was there for you when no one else was, how these other people were nothing to you because when you needed someone most they couldnt stop what they were doing to help you. Well the sad thing is, you had that true friend in me, and now you've lost it. I cant stand around and do nothing. I hate watching you talk about how everyone is your friend and then you talk about them behind their back. I wonder if you did the same to me. But they werent fool enough to bring you so far into their lives like i did. One day you will realize life isn't just some big party, and you cant hurt someone and expect them to be there for you. You think things are so excellent, be on the recieving end of this friendship, you wont think it anymore. What once was is no more.

Your the one that was there for me when things were hard. You listened to my tears and to my fears. You always let me know that it was going to be ok. But now I sit here and wonder if things will ever be ok again. I try and not think of you being gone, just that its been a while since ive seen you. But I cant pretend anymore. The tears just fall, the pain still feels as raw as the day it happend. Im scared and Im lost, no one understands me the way you do. I have so many fears and doubts and no where to let them loose. I hate God for taken you and I love him at the same time. Knowing if you were here you would be in pain, but knowing your gone hurts. I hate myself for not saying goodbye, for being to scared and running. I wish I would have stayed and told you I Loved You. Or that everything was going to be ok, why couldn't I be as strong as you were. You were hurting and I ran from you. ........