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What are you waiting for?
after a recent conversation with an amazing friend of mine about me being single... i decided to have a little open dialogue with myself.
this is what transpired:
hmmm. the single life. the good life? most times. the sad times are the lonely times. better to settle and learn to love? been there, tried that. fuck that.
just tired. tired of having relationships end bad. tired of giving my all to the wrong ones. tired of making the same mistakes the other guys make. ive learned though. ive spent time in a self induced prison. to reflect and pay for mistakes ive made. and like a reformed man, i refuse to make them again. the guy sitting in jail for killing someone drunk driving wishes every second of every day for his freedom. hes reminded everytime he opens his eyes and looks around of where he is and why hes there. and he swears to never repeat the actions that got him there. my mistakes. ive made the same ones everyone has. but im done making them. ill never forget the time in the cell.
but for now, still tired. tired of giving the wrong girls the opportunity to be rescued from dating the average douchebag. tired of always being too nice. all good though. id rather be a real man. id rather be a gentleman. instead of feeding the stereotype that women always stay with the ones that treat them like garbage. never go down to that level. then the guy looking back at you in the mirror isnt a man to be proud of. unlike now. that guy has his head up. he deserves to...
kool tho. i have my workouts. i have my music. house music. its in my soul. it keeps me sane. grounded. my heart feels light. i dont need little wayne. nicki minaj. drake. jay z. tupac and biggie. mainstream. stereotypical. bandwagon. fuck that.
stand up. be you. walk your talk. dont be a character in somebodys perception of what is cool in life. or what you need to be. the high road is always the hardest. stay on it. carry the torch and blaze trails. being a carbon copy just to fit into a life thats comfortable may have you fit into a spot you never wanted. what price is your soul worth? never sell out. mine has no price on it. #truth
wouldnt it be easier to be one of the sheep? hell yes. let me grab some jordans. drink some grey goose and redbull. or some hennessey and heinekens. listen to some little wayne. throw on a yankees fitted hat. watch scarface. maybe get a "only God can judge me" tattoo. definitely smoke a few blunts.talk about buying an ak. maybe get myself a pitbull. buy an iphone and talk mad shit about girls and brag about money over bitches. wear a striped button up with some jeans to the club with 5 of my boys all dressed the exact same and doing shots of patron. show all my friends naked pictures of all the girls i talk to. lie to one girl about not sleeping with another. hellll yes. bet that would get the women tripping over themselves to be with me. seems that thats the way to go. you should be that. be that... be that?? fuck that.
my swagger is internal. swagger cant be bought. and its not mainstream. its not carbon copy. i dont wear jordans.i dont need jordans. jordans dont make you cool. 85% of the dickheads i see on the street are wearing them. they dont make somebody whos an ass to people all of a sudden "cool".... they make you a douchebag in expensive sneakers. i dont need to drive a harley either. i dont need a harley to validate me. uncle drives a harley because he likes them. always has. always will. but... he acknowldges that other bikes exist. hes not that guy that hides behind that harley crest and says "if youre not on the popular bike, you suck and im better". the popular bike. the popular sneakers. the popular music. all those things are led to by a sign that says "the easy road"... im man enough without attaching myself to some symbol and hoping it makes me more desirable by association. simply.... fuck that.
one will come along and she will love me. outside and inside. she will love me for the fact that im man enough to be me. that my reasons are true and pure. and when she does, ill know shes the one. she will be the one that makes the wait worth it. she will be the one that makes me say those 3 little words for the first time in a year. she will be the one...
be the one that makes my heart race when she calls. not just for the first few weeks, but everytime.
be the one that makes me stop comparing every girl i meet to my ex.
be the one that makes me stop changing the channel everytime a love song comes on the radio.
be the one that is truly the first thing i think of when i wake up.
be the one that i sleep better when its with her.
be the one that doesnt have to hide her phone because her guy friends are disrespectful of our relationship
be the one that deserves the gifts, the trips, the thoughtfulness, and the love.
be the one that i truly believe is the most beautiful girl in the world.
be the one that will dance with me in the aisles at a store for no reason
be the one that waits for me because im worth it. not abandon me because 10 other guys are falling all over you
be the one that will stop running to the car to kiss me in the rain
be the one to hold my hand and be proud im hers
be the one that makes me want to make her friends jealous, and their boyfriends hate me.
be the one that dries my tears at the cemetary, and gives me space when i get home.
be the one that appreciates, loves, and respects me always
be the one thats the missing piece to the jigsaw puzzle of my life...........
shes out there. and she will find me. til then... just keep the swag internal and keep the rythym in your soul
HouseMusic
*edit: after a few messages, i had to add this. NO i didnt go to jail for killing someone drunk driving. i was making a comparison. and NO I dont hate Harley Davidsons. i like them. i just dont like guys that buy a Harley to make up for personality shortcomings then project their attitudes on people that dont have or cant afford a nice motorcycle. hope this clears things up for you all...
