noOne's blog: "My Poetry"

It's hard to say the word

Even now twenty years gone by.

Just thinking about the word

Makes me feel anxious,

wanting to cry



I don't think about that night

As much as I used to,

But the memory will never

fade completely

A fight with a memory

That I always lose to.



I still feel it's my fault

I still feel guilty

If I hadn't been out that night,

It wouldn't have happened to me.



I've been told by a few

That I am not to blame

But it's hard for me to accept that

So I continue to live with the shame.



I relive it in my dreams

Every once in a while

I hear his evil voice

I see his wicked smile.



He threatens my life

If I cry out or scream

So I let him take my body

So continues the bad dream.



He assaults me and tortures me

For six hours straight,

Humiliating and degrading me

His intent is filled with hate.



When the sun starts to rise,

I'm finally able to break free.

I'm injured and I'm bloody

But I somehow manage to flee.



I got away with my life

Even though badly hurt.

And now twenty years later

It's still hard to say the word



I live with the nightmare

I wish I could escape

It's still hard to say the word

And that word would be RAPE

~~ Melynda     December 06. 2009