The Break up

I was waiting in the morning for Bella outside her house as usual.  She came bouncing out of her house with a huge smile on her face.  She raced to the car as soon as she saw it.  I got out and opened the door for her; before she stepped in she reached up and gave me a kiss.

“Good morning” She smiled.

I smiled back “Good morning”

It was hard to smile with what I had on my mind.  I drove slowly to school, trying to find a way to tell her that it was over.  I decided that I would think it over some more and take her for a walk after school.

The day went by slowly, dragged on.  Lunch finally arrived and I went to meet Bella outside her classroom door.  She walked out and immediately smiled when she saw me, taking my hand and leading me to the cafeteria.

“What’s wrong Edward; you don’t seem quite like yourself today?”

“Just been doing a lot of thinking Bella, I’d like to go for a walk after school and talk”

“I’d love to Edward; you know how much I enjoy spending time with you.”

“Since we are going for a walk after school, I should give Alice my car keys, please excuse me for a moment”

I left Bella sitting at the table and went to talk to Alice.

“Hey Edward, what’s up” Alice asked noticing the somber look on my face.

“I’m going for a walk after school with Bella, and I need you to take my car home please”

“I knew you were going to ask me that”

“Why am I not surprised” I said handing her my car keys.

“Good luck Edward, try and do it as gently as possible”

“Thanks Alice, I’ll try.  I know how much Bella means to you, and how close you have become.  I think you might have to pick up her broken pieces, because she is going to be hurting”

Lunch ended and we went to biology.  I felt a bit uneasy about what I was going to do after school.  I sat quietly in class, watching Bella’s body language.  She seemed excited about something, and I knew that she had no reason to be excited. 

The rest of the afternoon flew by fast.  I met Bella outside her last class and we walked together into the forest outside the school.  We walked for ten minutes, and then I abruptly stopped. 

“Bella?”

“Yes”

“I don’t think we should be together, it’s wrong.  I realized last night after…that I could’ve easily killed you.  I’m not right for you, nor am I safe for you.”  I was looking straight ahead as I said it.  I knew she would start crying and almost on cue the tears came.

“What! Why! Edward you’re good for me, can’t you see?” she said sobbing uncontrollably.

“Look Bella, I never intended to hurt you.  I really do care for you, and I want to see you have the best of everything in life, but I’m not what is best for you.  With me you will always be in danger, at risk of getting hurt”

“You can turn me, make me like you” she sobbed.

“No! I refuse to change you Bella.  I will not take your soul from you” I spat.

 “I’m so sorry Bella, I never meant for this to happen” At this very moment I wished for nothing, but to be able to hear her thoughts. 

She looked me in the eyes “Tell me you don’t love me? Tell me that last night wasn’t one of the best nights of your entire life?”

I looked into her eyes and said “Bella I don’t love you, last night was amazing, but it wasn’t how I imagined.  The spark just wasn’t there”

The tears started coming faster.  I could hear her crying, but I didn’t dare to look at her. 

“Again I’m sorry” I said and walked off into the forest.

I heard her yelling my name as I ran from the spot where I left her; there was agony in her voice.  I kept running until I was outside my house.

Alice appeared out of nowhere “Want me to go after her and make sure she is ok? I know how hard that had to have been for you.”

“I’ve hurt her, I cut so deep.  Last night we…”

Alice was stunned “You and Bella…”

“Yes I was trying to prove to myself that you were wrong, but of course you were right Alice, as always.”

“Edward you could’ve…”

“I know Alice it was reckless of me”

“I better go find her quick before she does something stupid” Alice replied.

“No Alice, let her be.  It’s hard enough for her right now.”

I sat alone in my room, agonizing over the pain I had caused Bella.  All of a sudden I heard the phone ring, Alice was then right there in front of me.

“Bella is missing Edward” she said “That was Charlie, he said she never came home from school”

“What, I didn’t take her deep into the forest Alice.  Why didn’t she get home?”

Alice focused and then said “Edward she tried to follow you, and is lying in the forest unconscious”

“Alice we’ve got to find her” I cried in hysterics.

“No Edward, you stay here, I’ll go look for her.  I’ll somehow lead the search party to her location without being seen”

Alice ran out of the house and went in search of Bella.

I waited one grueling hour for Alice to return.  I was sitting on the couch when she came in; she knew exactly where to find me of course.  I stood up as soon as she entered the room.

“Well how is she?” I asked quickly.

 “She’s deeply hurt Edward, she gave herself to you because she loves you, then finds out that you don’t reciprocate those feelings”

“I know Alice, I’ve hurt her deeply.  I need to find a way to help her through this”

“I really did think she was the one Alice.  She made me feel like I could walk on air, she didn’t see me as a monster, after she found out what I was”

“Things people say and do have effects on other’s Edward.  She brought out the human feelings in you.  Maybe in another life you could’ve been good for her, but this is the hand you were dealt.  You’re not human, and she’s fragile and very breakable”

“I know you’re right Alice, but it hurts to know that she’s lying in her room bawling her eyes out over me.  I feel really bad, I never meant to hurt her like this”

“I know Edward” she said and hugged me.  “It will all work out Edward.  She will be happy again”

“How can you be sure Alice?”

“Well because Edward, you weren’t the only one after her heart” she pointed out.

 “Yes, you are right Alice.  Jacob would be good for her.  I’m going to go and have a talk to him”

“Do you think that’s a good idea Edward?  How will you talk to him, without breaking the treaty?”

“I guess it will have to wait then” I frowned.

“I need to see her for myself, see if she’s alright”

“She’s fine Edward, Charlie found her and she is at home in bed.  I think you’ve done enough, don’t you”

I flinched at her words, but she was right.  I had done enough damage, and going to see her would just make things worse.