God, with the loss of my sister's best friend and her grandson/my great
great nephew...my heart is even more heavy this evening.
my sister and I may be burying our father a lot sooner then thought
and it hurts more than words can say....it is hard to write this notice
because I guess I cant stop crying.
As far as we knew, our father was in Port Angeles, Washington. He has
been there since November 3rd. My sister had sent my father about three
weeks ago telling him how concerned she was and just wished he would
get help. The day he got her letter, he called me and told me to tell her
thank you and that he loved us.
we hadn't heard from him since.
Last night about 8pm, I call him to see how he is. It goes straight
to voice mail. I didnt think a thing of it, and left him a message
saying I loved him and missed him.
At 4pm this evening, I was checking my email, and had just posted
here when my cell rang. It showed up under "Dad" so I assumed he was
returning my call. I answered with "hello" and there was no answer so I
asked "how are you, dad?" I heard a few voices and a strange voice asked me
if I was Celeste Barnes. I said yes. He asked how I knew Roy Poore. "I
am his daughter."....
my father was found in a motel less then 6 blocks away(cindi, it was
the Royal Scott motel on division) by housekeeping. He was unconscious,
bearly breathing and non-responsive. I started crying. The sherriff
mentioned that there was nothing in the motel room other then an empty
prescription bottle and a letter addressed to me. I guess when he saw the
letter, he searched dad's phone and found my number.
He was taken to Holy family hospital. I called my sister and she
pciked me up immediately. Today is my sisters birthday. He tried to kill
himself on her birthday.
When we got there, he was in the trauma unit. Cinde(my sister) and I
kept begging him to wake up but there has been no response even now.
They were using charcoal on him, trying to counteract the overdose..
They did a catscan on him which they said turned out alright and that
he would wake up(however the doctor did say "hopefully he will."
Dad's luggage was still at the Royal Scott, so my sister went about
6pm with her husband to go get his stuff to see if there was any
information. ANY SIGN. I was going to go ask for dad's stuff so that I could
read the letter, but she didnt want me there alone when I read it.
During this time, the sheriff came in and gave me dad's glasses, his
wallet, his watch, his cell phone, his checkbook and the letter...The
sheriff needed me to open it to see if it was a suicide note. By the
Goddess, it was. It was addressed to me, name mispelled. In the envelope
was a letter plastic bag. In the the plastic bag was the letter, and in
the $170. In the letter, he kept saying he hopes mom "has fun". He said
he was going to join his grandmother on the other side.
NEVER did he say he LOVED US. NEVER DID HE SAY I AM SORRY!!!!
NOTHING!!!!!
my sister had to leave about 8pm. Before she left, the paramedic who
had came to scene came to check on him. He said that if he had been
found 5-10 minutes later, my father would already be dead. I stayed until
9:15pm while they took him up to ICU. I talked to the RN handling my
fathers case and she said now it is just a waiting game.. I answered some
medical questions and explained to the nurse what has been happening.
I am now home. I scared...I couldnt stand looking at him hooked up
the ventilator. He has always been my superman and now...he looked so
fragile. so weak. so lifeless. He still cannot breathe on his own.
my sister is going to see him first thing tomorrow morning and I will
go to work as normal. The hospital is to call her and I if there is ANY
change.
I just dont know. My father may not make it. He may have gotten his
wish to die. Last time he tried, it was minor. No real consequences. But
seeing his non responsive and not breathing...
goddess, I am scared. I just dont know....i dont want to bury him!!!!
While my sister was there she kepting saying "I love you dad/ It is
time to wake up." and once she was gone, I kept talking to him..telling
him I needed him.
My family is torn apart. I cant lose him too...
Crimson
