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A cop stops a car for traveling faster than the posted speed limit. He asks the man his name. "Fred," he replies. "Fred what?" the officer asks. "Just Fred," the man responds. The officer is in a good mood, doesn't smell alcohol, and thinks he might just give the fellow a break and write him out a warning instead of a ticket. So the officer then presses him for the last name. The man tells him that he used to have a last name but lost it. The officer thinks that he has a nut case on his hands but plays along with it. "Tell me, Fred, how did you lose your last name?" The man replies, "It's a long story, so stay with me." "I was born Fred Dingaling. I know -- a funny last name. The kids used to tease me all the time. So I stayed to myself, studied hard, and got good grades. When I got older I realized that I wanted to be a doctor I went through college, medical school, internship, residency, and finally got my degree, so I was Fred Dingaling, MD. "After a while I got bored being a doctor, so I decided to go back to school. Dentistry was my dream! Got all the way through school, got my degree, so then I was Fred Dingaling, MD, DDS. "Got bored doing dentistry, so I started fooling around with my assistant and she gave me VD. So now I was Fred Dingaling, MD, DDS, with VD. Well, the ADA found out about the VD, so they took away my DDS. Then I was Fred Dingaling, MD with VD. Then the AMA found out about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away my MD leaving me as Fred Dingaling with VD. Then the VD took away my Dingaling, so now I am Just Fred." The officer walked away in tears, laughing.
Red neck pick up lines 1) Did you fart? cuz you blew me away. 2) Are yer parents retarded? cuz ya sure are special. 3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea . I can ' t hold it in. 4) Do you have a library card? cuz I ' d like to sign you out. 5) Is there a mirror in yer pants? cuz I can see myself in em. 6) If you in I were Squirrels, I ' d store my nuts in yer hole. 7) You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty ' s only a light switch away. 8) Man - "Fat Penguin!" Woman - "WHAT?" Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice." 9) I know I ' m not no Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make yer bed-rock. 10) I can ' t find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went inta this cheap motel room. 11) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner. 12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin, we kin sleep til afternoon. and.... the best for last! 13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench, every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.
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