okay so i originally started on my cherry so that i could have a place that was my own that no one knew about and i could write *figurativly speaking* down my thoughts. Well here it is the 15th of November, been married for a little over 2 months. I am happy as can be...however i am having all these sypmtoms of being pregnant. i am a few days late and totally spazing out. this will be my second if i am. my husband seems to be happy as a clam this will be his first. i have a drs appt on monday to find out for sure because stupid home pregnancy test has a faint line in the positive area...and i dont trust those stupid things all too much, when the last time i was pregnant i had to take 4 of the damn things 2 said neg. 1 no control line and finally the fourth said positive. so here we are once again down this road and i am having mixed emotions about the whole thing. yes this is something that we BOTH wanted first and foremost!! but thinking about it and actually doing it (so to speak) are two completely different things. there is so much going on right now, we are planning on moving into a house in less than 2 weeks, i just got my daughter back on a semi fulltime basis from my parents *which that in and of itself is a long story* just seems like maybe this isnt the right time...but who really plans on these things happenig anyway, right??? Im not exactly sure why i am freaking out so badly, its not like this is a horrible thing, its a total gift from God and maybe this time i will do things right.
just some thoughts....
