Wishy's blog: "Poems"

Wondering who, wondering why someone would play me for a fool He was the only one who knew what was in my heart Not wanting to believe, he couldn't be trusted How can someone be so cruel to play with someone's emotions? Was it too hard to be truthful? Was it too easy to just play along? Or was it all a ploy in some harsh game? Not caring that they shattered someone's dreams, broke their hopes, but also crushed the one who held on the them so tightly.

Shattered Hearts Fallen Dreams Broken Tears from deep within Nothing ever stays the same feelings and emotions always change.

Living, Loving, Learning And being who everyone else Wants me to be Doing what everyone else Expects me to do It’s like being crammed into a chrysalis I have felt a calming breeze Coming from an opening? Wanting more, wanting to stretch, Open up and flap wings. Eagerly anticipating, When this chrysalis will burst apart. When I can spread my wings And await my first flight In hopes and dreams of many more That finds the freedom I’ve been looking for.

Standing ... looking hopefully into your eyes, Stars shinning, moon's glowing, coyote's howl fade from far away. I slowly take your hand and place it on my waitst, take the other, kiss your palm, and place your hand against my face. Tip toe and kiss you ... falling against your body. You hold me close, our bodies pressed firmly against one another. Kissing, tongues exploring each other, stopping to stare into each other's eyes. You smile and say "hello". I sigh, tears falling from my eyes, and smile, "yes, finally, hello!"

Outside the rain slowly falls from dreary skies Like the tears that rain from my broken heart Ever so steady, never missing a beat, Like the pitter patter of the drops of rain falling into puddles, with each drop of rain, there's a constant pounding of pain. Shattered dreams that no one knows ... or the rain that fall from within.

I feel like such a fool for thinking that there could even be more then just a screen . . . to think I really believed you could really care . . . it's not that I am married ... it was just a game for you . . . I wonder why you couldn't tell me it's just lies . . . crying doesn't ease the pain . . . smiling only hides my disgrace . . . I could never face you again . .. knowing I was only your fool.

It's 2008 and it's not too late Time for a new way of life to begin Time to let go of those I should resign This year has just begun and It's time to have some fun Rhymes and reasons have changed their beats Time I get up off my seat Find the things that make me sing To believe in myself and let it ring This is my year I want to shine I know I will do just fine I've come to the Y in my path again The decision isn't very clear Do I go right or to the left? I know I've been standing here way to long I've turned back a few times only to Come back to this place again I've wanted a peek but can't tell if one side is better then the other I know it shouln't matter I need to move on down the road and hopefully loose this heavy load Anything's better then just standing here!

I wanted you to be the one Who stood there by the door The one who'd catch me if I'd fall The one with all his charms Now I realize, they were all just lies.

My dreams of you have not faded The have only become stronger and clearer I feel myself in your arms I feel the warmth of you body laying next to mine Soft, warm, wet kisses on my face and my neck Our bodies in twined And the rush of emotions the splendor of delight As we collide and become one . . . Senses heighten . . . Our bodies together in a slow and steady rhythm Moving together … pleasuring our souls … As we explode and look into each others eyes … Kissing as lay in each other's arms . . . Holding each other … till we drift off to sleep I awake … wondering where you have gone . . . Realizing it's only my mind, body, soul wishin again.

SILENCE Your silence says it all ... No responses, not even a wow ... Without saying or doing a thing ... You've shown me everything! I have no choice but to turn and walk away ... with absolutely no regrets ... but not without any tears or memories. BROKEN DREAMS It's time to stop wishin on this fantasy This dream that will never be Am I giving this up? Yes it is time to toss it away It's the reality that I know it will never come my way. As hard as I try I still sit here and cry This dream, this fantasy felt so real to me It is very hard to admit that it's only just a dream It's not reality or even truly a part of me.