These are actual newspaper ads.
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 years old. Hateful little dog. Bites.
FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.
FREE PUPPIES . . . Part German Shepherd, part stupid dog
FREE GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. Neutered. Speaks German.
FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG. Looks like a rat; been out a while. Better be a reward.
YOUNG COWS: NEVER BRED $300 Each . . . Also 1 gay bull $250.
NORDIC TRACK $300 Hardly used, call Chubby
GEORGIA PEACHES, California grown - 89 cents lb.
JOINING NUDIST COLONY! Must sell washer and dryer $300
WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE. Worn once by mistake. $375 Call Stephanie.
(And the best one)
FOR SALE BY OWNER: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000 or best offer. No longer needed, got married last month. Wife knows everything.