football is for wimps's blog: "modern love defined"

I found blood in my vomit last night.

they don't see you they've covered you in paint you don't see me you won't find me I am not out there I am your imagination

soaking in the world... saturated by its matter... puzzled by its means... world replaces soul... becoming what you possess... displaces who you are... time passes as you try to grip what you can... at that same time... leaving remains of empirical matter... emptying the metaphysical hands of your mind to get back what you had somehow left behind... your youth where? when? why have you left this child? I don't know where. I don't know when. I don't know why.

I haven't dated until I was 21 and I also haven't had a girlfriend yet. I'm glad though, for myself. It seems everyone around ends up with really bad relationships or their relationships never truly last. It's almost as if dating/fucking has replaced friendship/love. I wish it could be better for the rest of the world, but it's not; because in the end it ultimately affects every individual, including me (and your momma, yo' daddy, and yo' greasy granny). I try not to be influenced by current social standards, but it can get lonely, when you walk the way I do. However, it's nothing I'm not used to. I've got to be careful with who I decide to spend my time with, because my love is REAL and I deserve a partner who is on the same page. I got feelings, even though my world does not. Don't come to conclusions just because I've never had a girlfriend. That doesn't mean anything. It is what it is. I am a patient person. All of us are waiting for something, it's just that I wait for more. ----------------------------------------------- I'm not looking for some hot clone out there who is with the(ways of the) world, but one who is REALLY 'with' me; who knows themself and can connect with me on that intimate level. One who can reason properly, one that can let go of "things." Just that one person... ..has not been revealed... I deserve the person who has waited for one like me, not someone who waits for the next best thing to come. You can't carry my heart if your hands are tryin to hold on some other shit. Know what I mean motherfucker?

i thought that i was falling in love but little did i know, i was falling from above because my heart went pitter-patter i thought that my emotions were getting fatter silly me, to think such a thought i've already given love everything i've got five years it took, stole, and ran it left me a jaded, bitter, angry man how could i forget, how bad it hurt when it took my heart, and threw it in the dirt left it lonely, hurt and abused i begged it to let me up, but it refused love, loved to see me in such pain my light and spirit, both started to wane i tried real hard to figure it out but i no longer knew what love was about we're told it's special, and full of bliss i never thought it would treat me like this so, i promised myself, if i fell again that i wouldn't go hanging from a fragile limb i'll make sure it's sturdy and strong so, that when it goes inevitably wrong i won't fall as far as i did before or maybe, i just shouldn't fall in love anymore