He was in the lead humvee, manning the comm gear....We had 7 more weeks of THE SUCK before we rotated back state-side.It's mostly a blur to me now.....Long story short, His vehicle , his side took a helluva blast from a 3-shell daisy-chain(suffice it to say dat thats a bad day when ur round n one those fuckers goes off).....We drove into a well-executed squad sized ambush.....MY Warriors....yea, MY 4 Warriors KNEW what my priority was and these mother fuckers went cyclic on those Haji asses....cyclic fire is a "melt the barrel"  rate of fire...within the first ten seconds of the initial blast MY Warriors put up an inpenetrable wall of lead, smoke and shrapnel.....a wall of death....I remember getting to the mangled HMVEE and seeing Brady's ass scrambling out the overturned mess. "Armor did its job" WAS MY QUICK THOUGHT.....Then he tried to standand as he reached the standing position, it became all too apparent that shit was NOT cool. Enitre right leg of pants had already saturated with not the bright red blood of veins.....but the dark, thick Oxygenated blood only found in arteries....Slow-mtion....everything seems SOOO fucking SLOW....the time it takes for me to close the few yards between us.....the time it takes for him to collapse ....I get to him....well, I slide into him....taking out my SQB combat knife, I ain't dickin' round with taking his pants off , they're getting cut NOW......4 seconds to do .....his leg has instinctively cramped , bringing his knee up to his chest in an effort to slow the rapid blood loss....I'm assessing....2 seconds....I scream into his ear that I've got to get to his leg, this shits gonna hurt...I grab his knee n yank it down and get welcomed to an unbelievable geyser of arterial spray that hits me square in the middle of my body armor and goes over my entire being. He screams.....a scream that I hear every time I sleep....so I do ALOT of Rx speed...but thats another story....there's a 3-inch gash on Brady's thigh that 2 inches more would've Brady a nutless but very much ALIVE dude. I look at MY Fallen Warrior, at his blueish clamy face and he sees the look in my eyes .....I scream NO, GODAMNIT,HANG THE FUCK ON, I GOTTA CLAMP IT OFF,HANG THE FUCK ON!!!!No warning given, I plunge my right index finger into the hole cause i can't see a fuggin' thing cause all the blood. I have to feel the femoral artery that has been severed and have GOT to get a pair of clamps on it...by this time the Corpman has come up and he's a good dude, ...he knows...so he lets me vainly ....so FUCKING vainly fight to save MY Warriors life....he knows theres nothing he could do any betterso he sits on Brady's legs as they constantly spasm. I feel the flow but I can't find the end of the goddamn thing.....30 seconds doing this....By this time I'm COVERED in blood, my Kevlar n Gargoyles have long been thrown aside(helmet/shooting glasses)....the flow AND the force of the flow are slowing.....I withdrawl my cramping finger from the wound and give Doc Hoyle a look an he takes over what I was doing as I lift my buds head an put it in my lap and look down into his eyes...to let him know that I'm here....that I know whats happening and I know YOU know....
   There's a light in a persons eyes...you know that??? You never notice it cause ur always seeing it...its their LIFE...thats what the fuck that light is....Their LIFE.....and I saw...unblinkingl;y and through a sheen of tears welling up in my own...that light slip slowly from Brady's eyes that day in the eternally fucked-up country of Iraq, In the mean streets of the city of Fallujah, on the scorched earth....and I saw it flicker....I saw a spark....and then I saw nothing .....there was a vast emptyness in that set eyes I was falling into .....like a bottomless well....I actually FELT that I was falling.....It was a spell only broken by  Doc Hoyle as he slowly lifted his bloody left hand to MY Warriors lids and closing them.....I knew at that moment my life had been changed if not forever, then at least forthe relatively short time I had left on it.....and I'm still counting as I'm MADLY banging away at these fuggin' little black keys ....bangin' away at the hopes that I've done right by MY Warriors....that I've done right by YOU,dear reader, .......and I on good days that I've done right by myself,just an old ShotOut,SpunOut Warrior , Jeff McCallie.....PEACE,YA'LL     

OK.......so I lied.......I'm not very laid back......I'm pretty much ur typical combat Marine vet......some days half shot out....a few fully.......sprinkled with a few ...a very few....of good ones. I don't like crowds, I hate loud sudden noises cause of the instinctive reactions i exhibit that can be pretty friggin' embarrassing....I have a love/hate relationship with my beloved Corps....I LOVE my brothers dat I fought,bleed,ate,cried,laughed with.....I HATE the beauracratic bullshit that the chains of command are imbedded with. I'm a Warrior,first and foremost...always will be.....not saying that cause I'm billy bad-ass, I'm not....what I am is FIERCELY loyal....if I'm with you, I'm WITH YOU.....all the way. I know what its like to take another life, I know that surreal experience of the first firefight one finds themselves in....ur heart feels like its gonna come bursting out thru the fire-resistant undershirt,the blouse, the body armor and ur web gear.....you feel ur guts go liquidy n ur bladder has a moment and you feel that ur living the last few moments of ur life...then the heart of the Warrior takes hold and the muscle memory kicks in....you rise over the low block wall ur covering behind with ur 4-man fire team , all as one as the roar of the M-60 machine guns lays down a suppressing fire as you bring the front sight post of ur M-4  toward the point of contact. The 60's hold fire after a good 4 or 5 10 round bursts.....you n ur Marines have the fields of fire and and the kill boxes are there....ready for the haji that wants to reveal himself and dare to try to fuck with ur brothers....shadowy movement n then the enemy is coming round his cover position to put rounds on you n ur Marines....a short,shallow inhale as you hold target just above n to the right of his turbined cranium, squeeze the trigger,don't yank...you send the 1st of many well-placed ,well-aimed shots of 5.56 ball round 80 yds down range,into the flesh, thru the muscle and into the vital organs of the bastard whose mission it is to kill you n everything you stand for.....so thats how I got my cherry popped.....

   All along it was a matter of WHEN...not IF one of the 4 Marines under me in Fire-Team 2,1st Squad,2nd Platoon, Fox Company,3rd Battalion,7th Marine Regiment, 1st Marine Division, Fleet Marine Force....had his candle snuffed....I KNEW I wouldn't take it well either cause like I said, when I'm with you,I'm WITH you....ALL THE WAY....and as a result of me being me, I bunked with, ate the shitty food, read the letters from the angels of our nightmares who were suffering in their own way at home,laughed with them as they laughed at ME cause I'm jus so fuggin' GOOFY sometimes, sweated with, shared porn with,.......I have never nor probably WILL eva share the kind of bonds that I had with those assholes.....K....mo lata, Dear Reader...PEACE>>>JEFF