I just need to write and get some stuff out...maybe it will make me feel better, at least i am hoping it will.
My son and his family came in about 9 days ago..I hadn't seen him in a year and a half and was very excited with lots of different emotions going on...it was a very emotional reunion and I really was looking forward to spending some time with my son and two granddaughters who are 3yrs and 6mths...lexi and molly.
The first night my son and I talked and things seemed as if they were going to be ok..i am a single parent and raised my son by myself, he has a great friendship with his granddad and grandma and i am grateful they were a big part of his life growing up. So of course he was talking about everything he wanted to do with me and grandma and grandpa while he was in. well my son and his wife had their 2nd anniversary last monday and i was asked to watch the babies all day and evening...which i jumped at the chance. I had planned on going shopping, out to the park for a picnic and swimming at my parents then having a little cookout and roast some mallows...just things i knew the kids would enjoy doing with their nana. When i told my son of the plans i had made he informed me that I wasn't allowed to take them anywhere..that i had to stay at my moms with them and wasnt even allowed to take them swimming! After listening to him set all these rules down I finally got him to agree to let me take Lexi to the store to buy her some things to play with like playdough, art supplies, bubbles, ect. he gave me two hours out with her...I was furious and very hurt. This boy whom i raised with alot of love and alot of sacrificing, the one i taught to swim at nine months old, the one who i did anything and everything for told me he didnt trust me with his kids! My reply was..."why"..I have never done anything to make him not trust me...I was a good mom who knew where he was and what he was doing at all times..i have never abused my son and never put him in any situation to be abused..including me staying single till he was raised because i didnt want to take the chance on getting with someone who would abuse either of us. I dont understand and I am so hurt that i dont know what to do. they have been to her mothers for the last five days...i have seen pics of all her family posted with the kids and my son...shooting guns, killing snakes...just crazy stuff...but not one pic has been posted from kristopher of me or any of his family...in fact no pics have even been takin of us.
they will be leaving this friday and he has not done anything with me and i still have not gotten the girls for a while to take and show them off to my friends..i dont understand and this has really hurt my heart..I love my son, he will be deploying for Iraq in december so this visit is a very important one to me...but now i am emotionally a mess and all i do is cry...I am at a loss and dont know what to do about it so i thought i would write...peace
