Being happy should not be this hard, Should it? I mean it seems that the more fake smiles i flash and the nicer i am, Karma bites me in the ass harder and harder, i mean i try and help out everyone i can i always smile and i am always there for anyone to lean on when they need a shoulder, i have always jumped and ran when any of my buddies needed me, i could be so mad that i couldn't see straight but if they called me i always went to help it didn't matter how pissed i was at them! But lately it seems i have gotten into this i dont give a shit mode! not about them not about me not about anything! i would much rather be alone then with my friends...drinking a hell of alot more then i should, starting fights with even my closest friends! i know that this person i have become sure as hell aint me and i dont like myself being that way i just cant help it sometimes..... well with all that being said at least i feel better even if i dont get any advise :)
