Item 1) Games
I bought a game for the PS2 called Ratchet & Clank. Heard it was good, and what I look for in a game, so I'd give it a try. I haven't been playing much of games worth lately, but I'm not as determined to master something in less than a week anymore.
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Item 2) Writing
I have not written any new poems since last week. Any poems I'll be putting up now are not exactly new or recent... more like five to six months ago. As for my story, I just seem to procrastinate despite many people asking when I plan to start the next chapter. Just haven't gotten around to it.
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Item 3) Emotions
I talk to someone often, then I don't hear much from them at all. It's starting to get obsessive, and I wish I wasn't doing this to myself. I did it once before and I lost all sense of character to myself. I ignored friends and just did nothing but hope I'd talk to that one person who I wanted to for the longest time. Whenever I get this way, I want to end up being emo or something and just tell myself the only way to get better is to be hated... I don't want that, but when I can't get what I want to feel happy, I just want it to go away so I don't feel hurt over absolutely nothing... I feel very pathetic.
Item 4) Working
Put applications out for places to work possibly besides tutoring which ends in two to three weeks. So far, I put two in. One for a video game store, and the other for a book store.
Item 5) Overall Life
Depressing. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm losing a care to play video games, work seems to be the only thing that is important to me. I just want to flat out say that I hate myself. I want to ignore this feeling of constant obsessing, but I don't know why I can't just ignore it. Maybe I just feel like I'll never talk to that one person ever again. Too many things in my end to complain or get angry over trying to find a solution...
