So if this is the begining, I don't want to see the end. I don't want to lose out on you in my life, your words, your humor, the way you hold me while I sleep. The way I try to get comfortable while i try to hold your larger frame in my smaller arms. You make me want to be a better person. You make me want to learn how to live, a happy almost bliss like existance. I'm getting there with you in my life. My friends see the change, as does my sister. I'm healthier now than I have ever been. It's not all you, a lot of it is me. I've learned who I don't want to be anymore, what I will not settle for, and what I am willing to do for that type of amazing love I spent my teen years reading about. That love poem worthy love, that you get when the day starts and continues. You get dizzy inside of your own body, not being able to see straight, not being able to think of anyone or anything other than that one person. That person who holds your hand when you need it, and that person who owns a large part of your heart. I can see true happiness in my future, Healthy, rich, college educated Rachel is in my future. And I am so praying that you will be there in some way. You in my life is the bonus, it's the sticker day under your lunch tray at school kind of future. There will always be bumps, and turns, and hurricanes, but with you I could indure them all and come back fighting.
