They're feeding starving children. They're educating the illiterate. They're saving the world, one vote at a time and tonight they'll pat themselves on the back and, presumably, top it all off with another execution, narrowing the field of contestants to five.
Because THIS is Idol Gives Back. And this is not a SIMULBLOG, in the classic sense, because to publish only to say that Carrie Underwood sang this or Kelly Clarkson sang that is redundant and, frankly, boring.
So I'll pick up the action when the bottom feeders are announced and, of course, clue everybody who's not watching yet into what the much-anticipated SHOCKER! is. And I'll reveal whether LaKisha or Chris is waving goodbye. So there will be spoilers, so you know the drill.
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Ryan, after majorly screwing up the opening intro, tells us we're in for the most shocking "result" in show history. Not an elimination, a result. And considering the camera can't stay away from Sanjaya, sitting with his sister in the audience, I'm holding onto my hope that Idol Gives [him] Back.
Melinda stands and is told she's safe. And considering she's the only one who could be a "shocking" boot, well...
And it's back to charity... Somebody wake me when it's time for the next "safe."
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Back to the couch. Blake is told to stand. He is safe.
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Phil is safe.
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LaKisha is told to stand. She says she's fine. And she's told she's safe.
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Chris and Jordin are told to stand. They're reminded of the songs they sang. Over 70 million votes were submitted. Both are told they're safe.
And that's what Ryan calls a "shock." If that were a true "shocker," we wouldn't have been talking about it all day.
The votes still count, and they will be added to next week's votes, when two of the kids will be executed.
Enough with the "shockers" already.
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I can't believe I wasted two hours for this.
