I just wanna curl up in a ball and cry and just let all the pain and anguish im feeling right now out so the whole world can know what im going thru.Love is supposed to be easy not hard.Its not supposed to still hurt when i see my ex with another woman when im happy for him.Its not supposed to kill me everytime i look into his eyes or think about how he used hold me when i lay in bed at nite.Im going crazy.I want someone to know what im going thru i want someone to tell me im not alone in this.I want him to tell me it kills him when he sees im online or hears my voice.I want someone who is always going to love me not run when its hard or say "im still in love you with you but i cant be with you"Honestly thats NOT A FUCKIN ANSWER.Damn just because its easy for him to say to me doesnt mean its easy for me to hear.I feel useless and cold.I want something different in my life but i dont know how im goin to accomplish that if i cant let go of the one person who i dont have a chance in hell with.I mean i still love him after everything he's out me thru i still love him,i still see myself with him.I want to just strangle him and make him feel what i feel right now put him thru the same bullshit he put me thru.I want to hate everyone but its not in my being its not me.Its 2:45 in the morning and im sitting here ranting about how much i love but really try to hate my ex.But its not just him its every man who ever told me "i love you,your the greatest girlfriend ever"If im the FUCKIN greatest girlfriend ever why cant they be with me?I know my faults i tell them my faults before it becomes serious but yet no one takes me seriously its like im a big joke to the world but i havent caught on yet.I give up on love and life and everything in between.I really wish that the day i walked out of his life he wouldve kept my heart because then i wouldnt have something breaking inside
