A lot of people on my friend's list know me personally... and many of you know how I am... or should I say how I was... I'm still Tony but I'm not the same Tony that many of you know... some of you may decide to have nothing to do with me now... and if that's how you feel, I'm not going to hold that against you... 2007 has brought many changes for me... I became single again... I was virtually homeless and almost had to stay in a homeless shelter... I've relocated back to Northwest Arkansas (I'm back in Fayetteville now)... I've realized that there are some really great people out there that have helped me through all this without making me feel like I owe them anything in return... as a matter of fact, most of them felt like I said something wrong when I told them that I would pay them back as soon as I could... I will say this, times were very rough for me but I never gave up... and now I'm stronger for it... and without help from friends (new and old), I wouldn't have made it... I did some soul searching through all this... and realized that I went through it all because I put myself in the position to do so... the lifestyle I was living was just leading down a path of destruction... I just wasn't living a life that I could be proud of...
I mentioned above that I'm not the same Tony that many of you know... and now I'll delve deeper into that statement... there was a morning that I woke up in a hotel room... I had no idea where I was going to be sleeping that night... I had no where to go... I had no money... I looked over and saw a Gideon's Bible on the dresser... of course, it's not unusual to find one of those in a hotel room... but it made me think about my life and how I had ran from God... and how I kept running farther and farther away from Him... I sat down on the bed and I prayed... for the first time in a very long time... I didn't know if He would even listen to me after I had turned my back on Him for so long... I asked Him where I should go and instantly the name of my best friend from high school popped into my head... I hadn't talked to this guy in many years... didn't even know if he still lived in the area... I picked up the phone book and looked for his name... there it was staring right up at me... I called my friend and we talked for awhile then I told him what I had been going through... I never asked him for help... he spoke up and told me that he had a place for me to stay... and that's where I am now... we are roommates and best friends... each day since I have seen God work miracles, big and small... I have experienced his forgiveness for my past... and my friend, Byron, and I have been working daily to make our walk with the Lord something that hopefully witnesses to others... I'm not here to tell you how to live your life... I'm not here to judge you... God gave us all freewill and who am I to try to take that way from anyone... I can only share with you what I have gone through... and if you'd rather delete me from your friend's list or have nothing else to do with me now... that is totally up to you... each day, I pray for me... Byron... my daughters (Britney & Hayley) and their mother that they live with... my friends... and everyone that I have dealings with... I want nothing but the best for all of you... I even pray for my ex-girlfriend and her kids... and many other people... I'm not bragging about it... just want you to know what is different about me now... I haven't really gone to church... I may start but I am really not into being a "religious" person... I feel that denominations and doctrines are man-made... and sometimes I see bickering between and among denominations... I'm not into that kind of drama... but I do believe fellowship among Christians is important...
I still have a long ways to go with my life... but I'm getting there day by day... I still like to hang out with friends... and I don't walk around preaching all the time... I still have a sense of humor and like to have fun... but I also want my life to glorify God... so there are things I won't do anymore... you can either accept me for who I am... or if you can't, then maybe it is time for us to part ways... it's up to you... and if you decide to move on, there will be no hard feelings... either way, you will still be in my prayers!
