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I made rolls, of the cinnamon variety.
I use cinnamon rolls as a sort of… well, anxiety calming drug. I don’t pop pills, I definitely pop cinnamon rolls.
See… there was this thing invented a good long while ago called the 10 Year Class Reunion. It’s where you get together with all the people that made fun of you during your painfully awkward teenage years. Yea. Why? Why do I have to do this? Can’t we all just become friends on Facebook and twitter and consider ourselves properly reunited!?
Seriously. The future is now!
Since I think I’m going to gracefully bow out of the reunion festivities, here’s the CliffsNotes of what I might have said to my old classmates.
Hi. Yea, it’s me C. I sat behind you in.. a bunch of classes probably. Here’s the update. I went to college. I read a lot of books. I have almost graduated. I traveled around some. I got married didnt get pregnant yet. Yea.. I’m prettier now, but that’s mostly because I was actually really ugly when you knew me. I’m a baker. I think it’s the most awesome thing ever. I know a crap ton about food. Would you like to discuss French cheeses at all? Sure, I’d like to meet your boyfriend Steve. I recognize him from your Facebook photos. Your relationship status is “complicated” though… care to discuss? No? Hm… well, sure I’d like to see pictures of your kids. Would you like to see pictures of my cinnamon rolls? It’s only fair.
Don’t make me go to this thing. It will be awkward. Awkward. Awkward. Awkward!
I need counsel and another cinnamon roll.
