My grandmother died in 1975, but her birthday is coming up, and
that always causes me to reminisce.
The long walks we used to take to the store on Brunswick Street,
the quarters she gave me for meaningless jobs like pulling weeds or
washing the sidewalk...
Those gems were all good, but the one I remember most, the jewel in the
crown of grandmotherly advice, occurred when I was only about 10.
We were sitting in a park having just finished collecting some 40
soda bottles for the deposit money on a beautiful spring day.
She told me that one day, I would find a wonderful woman and start my own
family.
"And remember always this thing," she said.
"Be sure you marry a woman with small hands."
"How come, Grandma?" I asked her.
She answered in her soft voice..
"Makes your dick look bigger."
Kinda brings a tear to your eye.