So I got bored the other night and posted a personals ad on craigslist....All I can say is OMFG it really opened my eyes to how superficial people are. Now the reason I say people and not men is because woman are guilty of the same exact thing. Why is it that now a days everyone is judged and criticized for evey little thing. From looks, to size, to every little detail. Granted the posting started out as just being a joke, but it has raised alot of question in my mind as to whether or not there are still decent unattached men in the world. Don't get me wrong I know there are, but where are they? Far too many times I see my friends settling for someone they aren't happy with, just because they want someone to care about them. I myself am guilty of this. It roots back to severe self esteem and insecurity issues, but working past those I have found alot that I was missing in my life previously.
Ok Back on Track.... Here is a copy of the posting.... Don't laugh too hard, but I figure if I am going to have fun with it, I may as well make it fun right? Then re-reading it I realised that its true, all of it.
Posting was Headlined with: "How Shallow Are You?"
Oh HELL!!!!!!!
1. I can't believe I am actually doing this.
2. I am a single mother with a teenage son.
3. I will openly admit that I can be a bitch, it has taken me years to earn that title please don't try and take it away now.
4. I am opinionated, I don't judge, I just always have an opinion.
5. I tend to talk alot when I am nervous
6. I am not perfect nor will I ever pretend to be
7. I am not petite, meaning I have weight on my bones and a few curves.
8. Within my curves I have an ASS that happens to be one of my best assets other than my eyes.
9. Don't ask about my tits because I am not happy with them either. They were big before having a child. Now Whatthefuckever!!!!
10. I have baggage ALL WOMEN DO, and if they tell you they don't they're lying.
11. I am a down to earth laid back parent, I am friends with my son, but I am a Mom first. My sons friends call me Mom and they all wish that I was their Mom. Whatever they call it now, it was called being the "Cool Mom" when I was younger. Please do not try and tell me how to raise my son. His dad has tried the conventional way, and my son has no respect for him.
12. Honesty is one of my biggest pet peeves. Don't lie to me to make me feel better, I would much rather hear the truth no matter how brutal, than someone tell me what they THINK I want to hear.
13. Thinking causes "Dain Bramage"!!! Can You tell me without googling it, who said that and when?
14. I am not religious, I am spiritual and there is a difference, I don't care if you are religious, but please DO NOT try and convert me, it won't happen!
15. I have recently been told by approximately 75 people that I am a MILF!!!!! They LIED, see #12.
16. If you ask for my picture and you agree with the people in #15 see #12 and re-think your answer.
17. I have no problems talking shit about myself, I may not be 100% secure with my body, but I am secure enough to be able to make fun of myself. Refer to #9
18. I am that woman that all my friends come to for advise on their girlfriends, boyfriends, wives and husbands.
19. I am the one that all my guy friends who aren't married keep saying "Why Can't I Find Someone Like You?" Then again my guy friends that are married keep asking why they couldn't have married someone like me.
20. Hindsight is a pain in the ass, and no one ever realizes it until its too late. Get over it and move the fuck on.
21. Oh yeah I cuss, alot....
22. I drink weekly and socially, generally don't drink alone, unless it been a really really shitty day.
23. I don't drink girly fu-fu drinks either. My Favorite Beer is Newcastle, if I have to go domestic then its Bud Light. I drink hard alcohol too, just a few I refuse to drink.
24. I have tattoos
25. My tongue is pierced, that is NOT an invitation to send me an email to suck your dick.
26. My tongue is pierced because I had a someone tell me that I couldn't do something.
27. I don't take orders very well. Suggestions I will consider but not orders. (There are exceptions to every rule) I would be interested to know if you understand why I put that there.
28. I enjoy a variety of music. Mainly Country, Classic Rock, Rock, and Alternative. However if you look through the 16,000 music files on my computer I have a bit of everything.
29. I like sports, and I LOVE Hockey...
30. Most of my friends are MEN, get over it I get along with them better, and women have DRAMA and BAGGAGE. See #10
That all being said, there is alot more but I need to leave something to talk about later right?
So as for what I am looking for, nothing in particular. Ok well maybe so!
1. Can you be 100% honest
2. Can you make me smile
3. Can you make me laugh and keep me laughing
4. Can you hold an intelligent conversation
5. Can you really have a conversation at all
6. Are you spontaneous
7. You must like kids, especially teenagers, they are around alot!
8. You must be secure enough to handle #30 on my list.
If any of this has made you laugh, then I have done my job. I like to be able to make people laugh while being honest. I joke alot, I am very sarcastic, and sometimes just plain stupid. Life is interesting and just because you have to deal with it doesn't mean every moment has to be planned. There is alot of good and bad out there, I just tend to walk away from the bad. I am for the most part a good girl with very rough edges.
If any of this has caused you to go hmmmm, then feel free to email me. I will send a pic if requested but if you request mine yours must be included with your request. I will not send naked pics so don't ask.
Have a Good Day
I posted this ad once Tuesday night and again Thursday mid-morning. I was completely surprised at the complete different classes of individuals that replied between the differnet postings.
The ones that emailed me back were able to carry on an intelligent conversation and generally really nice guys. Then once pictures were exchanged all communication stopped completely. The funniest replies I think I got were the younger boys obsessed with the movie, "The Graduate" and looking for their own Mrs. Robinson.....lol One of which after a 6 hour converstation on and off about Cartoons from my era.... He asked me to meet him at a bar in Costa Mesa, surprisingly enough we took that conversation a little bit further and as it turns out I went to school with this persons Mom, and at one point had been very good freinds with her... Once that realization hit, I laughed even harder and told him to give his mom my email address. I am really glad that I decided to not talk about sex or anything of that nature with this kid. He seems like a good kid, and could be fun to hang around with in general but entirely way too immature for an adult relationship. There weren't near as many replies I thought there would be for people just wanting easy sex... I think only about 5 or 6.
There were also quite a few men who are considerably older than me looking for younger woman, sort of a Daughter complex thing. They all seem to feel younger than that of their ages and women their age just cant keep up with them. I have about 5 replies from men older than my father, and there were 2 around the same age as my Mom.
I have had very unique conversations with a few different people in which have replied. Al of which include real converstations on a large cariety of topics and SEX has not been the topic... That in itself has been a major thing that I was not expecting. These men really seem like "Good Guys" that just need a break in the dating world. Someone to just give them a chance, however so many of the woman searching are just as shallow as the men and personality has nothing to do with finding a significant other anymore.
I have been invited for coffee a few times, but have declined. I refuse to meet anyone in person that I have met online by myself ever again even in public sometimes doesn't help. I've done that once and lesson learned.....
All in all I've met some good guys, ones that at least through email and messenger I think can be good friends. There are still decent guys out there they are just few and far in between.
None of these men piqued my interest to walk away from my current relationship, and that in itself tells me more than I was really seeing myself. While I may not be 100% happy in my relationship, I am at about 90%. Until I posted this ad I didn't realise that I was even that happy with it. Posting this has taught me a lesson to stop over analysing everything that is and isn't said in a relationship. I find myself feeling more confident in myself and our relationship and not questioning every little thing anymore. In a sense this a very healthy relationship for me, and I think that the fact that we were just friends first has everything to do with it... You can't be happy in a relationship if you dont have a friendship first, if you base a relationship on sex then what comes of it but just sex.
All that being said, I am feeling rejuvenated and not so lonely anymore...
