Are you tired of those sissy-azz "Friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well here is a series of promises that actually speak of "True" friendship.
1. When you are sad - I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry *#^!!^! that made you sad.
2. When you are blue - I will try and dislodge whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile - I will know you finally got laid.
4. When you are scared - I will rag on you every chance I get.
5. When you are worried - I will tell you stories of how much worse it could be until you quit whinning.
6. When you are confused - I will use little words.
7. When you are sick - Stay the hell away from me until you are well. I don't want whatever you have.
8. When you fall - I will point and laugh at your clumsy azz.
9. This is my oath...I pledge it to the end. "Why?" you may ask, "because you are my friend."
Remember..A good friend will help you move
..........A REALLY good friend will help you move a body
..........let me know if you ever need me to bring a shovel
Friendship is like peeing in your pants, everyone can see it, but you can feel the true warmth
