Probably one of the most "taken for granted" aspects of our lives, is our mental health, that is, until illness saps your abilities to think straight. Your mental health then becomes the highest priority in your life.
Compare it to an athlete suddenly becoming paralyzed, and then multiply that envisioned feeling by 100. Hard to do? Yes, I know. I never had a clue what mental illness was about, until it ran over me like a freight train over a puppy. Since I have been able to claw and scratch my way back from the GATES OF HELL, where MAJOR DEPRESSION dropped me off, my mental health is an everyday focus, like breathing. I'll die if I don't pay attention to it.
You think I am being over dramatic? Then you are ignorant of the facts of MAJOR DEPRESSION and mental illnesses, in general. Don't worry, you are not alone. I have found the majority of people I've tried to explain what has happened to me, to be just like you. They don't have a clue.
For people stricken with these diseases, there are many mental illnesses and levels of each, the fact that hardly anyone can relate to what is happening inside their minds, only exacerbates their situation. "FRUSTRATION" does not do the feeling justice. "HELPLESSNESS" and "HOPELESSNESS" are better descriptive words of how a person with MAJOR DEPRESSION feels.
As in my situation, add the fact that a person's family, the base of support in a mentally ill person's cache of recovery tools, often do not and will not attempt, to understand what the disease can and is doing to their loved one. The family can make the situation "all about themselves" and leave the mentally ill person "out in the cold", to fend for themselves. Too many times, this is similar to signing a "death warrant" for the mentally ill person. One of the strongest symptoms of MAJOR DEPRESSION, is the temptation to end one's life, and be rid of the demons in their minds.
Luckily, I read about my disease and was aware of this, or I would've been found with a bullet hole in my head, too. That doesn't mean the idea doesn't still cross my mind, I'm just aware of WHY I have those thoughts and that they are not MY thoughts, but those brought on by the disease.
If you look at people that do incredibly out of character deeds, in most cases, I think, you could trace their actions back to their mental health issues and lack of support and understanding.
Just like the athlete that is paralyzed, would struggle against all odds of never walking again, mentally ill people are faced with the daunting task of regaining their mental health, but odds are, there is no one there to "hold them up" while they struggle with what does work and what doesn't work. It's not as clear to the "outside world" exactly what the problem is. There is no plainly evident problem, like paralysis. Instead, mentally ill persons are often misconstrued as "bad people" and their actions are held to the same accountability as those without the maiming effects of mental illness, hardly a fair deal. Try making the paralyzed athlete race physically healthy opponents and see how fair that is. Am I starting to see a glimmer of clarity here?
FATHER'S DAY is near. Instead of hoping my 2 grown children will contact me, since they haven't made an effort in the past, since my breakdown, I have elected to not sit and wait for an email that is not coming. That only breeds more fodder for the MENTAL ILLNESS to feed upon. I've blocked emails from them. That clears my mind of thinking there is a chance I will hear from them. I have taken the initiative and removed the possibility for sure. Now, I can concentrate on the tasks at hand, my future, and improving my mental health.
There is plenty of new information about MENTAL ILLNESSES readily available by doing simple searches for MENTAL ILLNESS or MAJOR DEPRESSION. That's how I learned about my problems and what I was facing in dealing with my personal "war" with the disease.
If you have close friends or relatives trapped in their own personal HELL of MENTAL ILLNESS, and you don't take the initiative to educate yourself about their disease, you are doing them a grave injustice and condemning your loved ones and friends to a continued life alone in their battles. You can hardly be considered a "friend" or a "loved one".
KNOWLEDGE is power. Ignorance, in the face of information, is a shameful disgrace.
