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As I sat here almost feeling sorry for myself for the last few years of my life I realized that we all have things. Some open wounds that feel like they will never heal. Some scared areas that feel like they are so calloused that they will never feel the same. All of the things both bad and good that shape who we are. Who we chose to be and what we chose not to be. I have spent years trying to deal through them to try and make myself into the women I am happy with only to let this world make me ashamed of it.
Has our morale compass led us so far from right that we can not even tell anymore? That we only value what a person can do for us? Only value physical pleasure and are caught up in the NOW. Does no one see what is under the skin. Does no one care to help heal some of those open wounds. Some of those scars that in ways keep us from letting someone truly in?
Caverns and empty places in our lives we wish were filled. There is so much more then the physical scars. Yet it seems that people don't care enough to try and uncover them. People are hurting and it seems as if no one cares. We walk past each other every day and may say some superficial hello or ask "how are you" but if the responce was more then just "ok" would we take the time to stop and find out why? How many times have you said you were "ok" when you weren't?
One of my challenges for the new year is to find the people who mean something and forget the ones that don't. To burn the bridges of the people who are only using me. To find friends who love me the way that I deserve and that allow me to love them in the same way. To be more open and to break down the walls that I have surrounded myself in for fear of being hurt.
We are all walking wounded, no one is perfect. No one has life all together. No one should expect more from people then they are willing to give. No one should use someone only for what they want or need. Those who matter will read this and those who don't well the choice is yours.
