Drama...dra·ma --- Pronunciation Key:[drah-muh, dram-uh]
As defined by Merriam-Webster: any situation or series of events having vivid, emotional, conflicting, or striking interest or result.
So something that I have been thinking about lately is drama. I personally don't mind a little drama from time to time. It makes things kinda tense, adrenaline kicks in a little, sexual desire and drive is peaked... that sorta thing. So for me; drama has never really had a negative connotation.
Then you come to a place like Fubar; where all the guys profiles mention something about not wanting any "drama" in their lives. I giggle to myself and think of how boring life must be if there is nothing exciting and intense going on for these people who so vehemently despise drama. Then I realize that seemingly people define drama in different ways. Maybe even pick and chose what portion of the definition provided by dictionary do com is more suited to them. Vivid and emotional is what I tend to like while most everyone else taps into conflicting (which isn't always a bad thing... did someone forget how awesome makeup s*x can be?).
With that said... I tend to think that those people who adamantly attempt to avoid drama might very well be causing most of the drama they detest. Now the reason I saw this is based purely on observations of things that occur in my life and my interactions with others. This would be my disclaimer as I am not professing to be the end all know it all of psychology of the opposite sex by any means. But in being one to observe people rather closely as well as interacting with others on a regular basis I sometimes feel compelled to document my observations to attempt validation through others.
In a recent experience with someone who abhorred drama; it turns out that he seemingly liked to create the drama... to swim in it a little and then run off leaving the pool there for whomever else stumbled across it. I am a straight forward and honest person who believes that there is really no place for bullsh*t. Honesty goes a long way and is worthy of much reward when it is provided. The reward system is something I implemented because it seemed that most people have had bad experiences with being honest and needed some sort of "cookie" for providing what they should be providing all along whether it left a bad taste in their mouth previously or not. Anyway, I enter each and every relationship I have with people with the premise that there shall always be honesty... or thou shalt haul a$$ out of my life before I find out you lied to me. ;) Everyone seems to agree to the terms and conditions of co-mingling with me; and then something happens and the agreement is broken on one side. The lying starts, over stupid things.... "I am so sorry I havent seen you in a month and a half or written you an email in over a week, or called to even say hi in over a week. I have been so busy with work...." actually translated in his own words to "I have been chatting it up with these other girls that I met online; Im considering meeting one of them in person even when I get the balls to ask her and I just dont have time for you any longer."
The perplexing thing is, I'm totally fine that he was chatting with other people and even wanting to meet them. Interaction is an absolute necessity for me, (Im not giving it up for anything) so I don't take any offense to such interactions taking place. It's the fact that these new interactions, were taking away from my interactions with this person and he did not feel compelled to re-adjust my expectations regarding the fact that he would rather be interacting with others than with me. It's one of those "why string me along?" kinda things that I wondered about, I even asked him why if he didn't have time for me, didn't he just let me go? (the response was I quote "I'm a selfish bastard I guess. I like spending my time with you when I have it." That was seemingly a lie as well). But Maybe he was onto something there... it's possibly the idea of keeping the sure thing in his back pocket. I'm hooked. I'm involved in the situation, I have love for this person, I'm not going anywhere unless given a valid reason to need to. The others that he is interacting with are new and different and possibly prepared to be in the same place I am in for him, but just in case... there is always me. Doesn't that make ya feel special lol.
Well, as all lies tend to do, they unraveled in an email he wrote to me that was basically a big ball of contradictions and naturally drama ensued based on the contradictions and lies. And here we are, in the midst of attempting to live without drama; where the only thing that had to be done to avoid drama was to be honest, and that was the last thing on earth this person seemed willing to do. I'm the bad guy for instituting the drama; but nowhere does he accept responsibility for being the spark that started the flame.
So in my observations of such situations like these; those that seemingly despise drama the most innately feel drawn to it even more. And I still dont believe that all drama is bad. The root of the drama, is bad.
*kttn*
