- I sold my 93 Laser i spent two years building and bought a 05 Cobalt
- I've wasted close to 90% of my life behind slow drivers and waiting on traffic
- I'll be buried in white K-Swiss sneakers
- My friends will tip Jager and Corona's in my memory
- I have pissed off everyone i have ever met at least once
- I have spent more cash on clothes than on parts for all my cars combined
- About 15 restaurants/bars will be glad to never see me again
- I've almost completely narrowed down who all my real friends are
- I've seen my friends more in the last year than i have my own family
- 90's techno will remind people of me
- I've never driven a skyline like i've always wanted
- My dad's garage will never be clean
- I've spent more money on alcohol than anything else ever
- I've logged more miles onto my car in one year than anyone else i've ever met
- I've gone through at a minimum of 60 gallons of hair gel and 5 times my weight in cologne
- I've been to Florida, Georgia, Texas, Oklahoma, New York, Canada, New Jersey, North and South Carolina, Maryland, West Virginia, and Virginia yet still manage to get lost 8 miles from my own house
- I've drank more than 25 times my own weight in soda in the past 3 years
- I used to make it a regular habit to use my bank card to get gas when there was only a dollar in the account
- I have never had any children at least none that i am aware of
- I am a cell phone, text message, and instant messenger fiend
- I've taught 70% of the people i know how to use myspace
- I've drank till i've puked on numerous occasions
- I find racing to be the ultimate high
- I have broken up with girls over some extremely petty reasons
- I was in more fights than i care to count in school
- I've spent more time driving my car than i have had sex
- I tend to judge people on their cars
- I spend more money in Aeropostale than in any other store
- I refuse to wear anything besides Aeropostale, American Eagle, or Hollister clothing
- I spend more time partying than anything else i know of
- I've read more car magazines than books in high school
- I've defended people who are more important to me than I am to myself
- In iraq i spend more time playing PS2 and talking on the net than anything else
- i dont find overreacting a bad thing
- i spend more time debating and argueing than anyone else known to man
- i have met the ape-man (he lives next door)
- i hate my battalion here in iraq more than anyone else in the world
- i've gotten the finger while driving more times than anyone i know
- i have no in between friends, all the people i know either love me or hate me
- i have yet to do a super street tour
- i believe capitol punishment should be legal in all states (firing squad anyone?)
- i believe anyone who burns the US flag should be drawn and quartered
- i have found the most senile people ever in the army
- i believe the best way to get to know someone is to get them drunk
- i've driven myself to intoxication but never drove intoxicated
- i have more speeding tickets than anyone else i know
- aeropostale would be empty is i had a credit card with no limit
- i own more pairs of white k-swiss sneakers than most of my g/f's have had in shoes overall
- i only have a year and seven months before i never have to say sergeant again
- i'm one of the craziest bastards i know
My name is Jeff and today is the day that i die.