sitting, spinning
silent, I'm screaming
a place ever sacred
my life what I make it
decisions
regrets
mistakes, don't forget
ask myself why
pretend not to cry
hold in the pain
it runs through my veins
poison my soul
I feel no longer Whole
sitting, spinning
is this the end
or beginning
how many more times
until I make up my mind
what will be enough
what will feel like too much
shouldn't I be there already
on my way to living steady
how much will I hurt
how many tears must I cry
when will I stop
having to ask myself why