I stand before you as a friend in pain,
My once happy relationship no longer well,
What used to be blissful and heavenly,
Is now more sullen than hell.
As you may remember,
Just two months past,
I had met a wonderful guy,
And had wondered if it would last.
You know how bad love has been to me,
How every time it has wounded my heart,
And yet I try again and again,
And again love and I soon part.
This time it felt different,
As if it was somehow stronger,
It seemed like this would last,
Yet it did not last any longer.
As I try and think of what went wrong,
Of why it did not last,
I come to find it was my fault,
That I was such an ass.
I could have done a lot different,
I could have done it right,
I could be sleeping soundly,
Instead of staying up all night.
I wonder if there's still hope,
If I call him would he listen,
I wonder if I told him sorry,
How much of him I am missing.
Would he stay on the phone,
Long enough for me to say,
That I long to be with him again,
Every night... every day.
Would he accept my apology,
Would he listen to my plea,
Would he want to forgive,
Would he want to see me.
I worry about his answer,
I fear a response of no,
I don't want to lose him,
I don't want to let go.
But I will never have closure,
Unless I pick up the phone,
And accept my actions as of late,
The mistakes I cannot condone.
Maybe he will listen,
Maybe he will not,
And if this struggle I do not win,
Well... at least I fought.
