RedByrd's blog: "Past..Present...Future.....Love"

September 11, 2001

Will remain to be a day of horror, misery, sorrow, heartache and pure fear. Not only for so many in the U.S., but also for so many around the world (families, friends, neighbors. People, we didn't even know). It had struck home in my heart, here in So. MD. 911 started out for me as it did every morning, getting up (about 6:30am) fixing hubby's' breakfast & lunch and seeing him off to work, letting the dogs out for their early morning routine of running off their energy. I washed & dried a load of clothes (typical housewife's day). So, decided to fold some things, while in my home office. Dropped another load of clothes in the washer. Decided to check my e-mail and answer some back. I was writing my sister-in-law back, just chit-chatting (still folding clothes and glancing at the news.) Suddenly, breaking news was interrupting my peaceful morn. Talk about a plane hitting one of the towers of the World Trade Center. I remember, seeing the smoke coming from the right tower, (at the time, it wasn't shown if it was a plane or anything as of yet) still corresponding with my sister-in-law about what was going on. I said to her, “I'll get back to you after I figure out what's going on.” I thought to myself, “Man, that's so sad, I wonder did the pilot lose control or something happen with the 'said' plane.” “That's so tragic.” As I continue to watch, I saw another plane enter the right side of the TV screen, I think, I said out loud, “Man, that plane is mighty close to that building” but noticed it didn't come around the other side, that's when it came to me, the plane hit the other tower. Smoke and flames jumped from the upper floors. I just screamed, “OH, MY GOD!!” My heart felt as if it had stopped beating and I stood in disbelief, trying to connect myself. I had to sit down before I fell. Not realizing I had dropped the clothes to the floor. As I continued to watch in horror, another news flash came, there was a report of smoke coming from the Pentagon, no report on what the smoke was from. Then it was said that a plane had crashed into the Pentagon's side. I just screamed, “TERRORIST ATTACK!!” My mind flashed to family members (son working at the FBI bldg, daughter-in-law at the Govt Printing Office, sister-in-law at FDIC, my little brother working in Georgetown and husband at DCs' Water/Waste Treatment Plant. Now, I'm in hysterics, wondering if they were ok. I called the FBI bldg. NO ANSWER. My sister-in-law. NO ANSWER. “OH GOD NO!!” I called the Govt Printing Office & WASA, still NO ANSWER. Now I'm about off my rocker with fear. MY WHOLE WORLD WAS GONE. I called my Mom, who was the only one I could get in contact with. “At least I have someone to keep living for.” I tried my brother's cell phone, no answer, I'm praying, “PLEASE GOD, DON'T DO THIS TO ME.” I didn't know at the time, phone lines were down and people were sent home. I watched the TV in grief as the 2 towers fell to the ground, “PLEASE GOD I CAN'T TAKE ANY MORE!!” Calling back and forth to my only link to life, my Mom, asking if she heard anything from my son or brother, if she heard anything “PLEASE CALL!!!” Crying and pacing the floor, calling Mom ever 5-6 secs., making sure she was still with me, reassuring me. I called my girlfriend and told her what I was going through, “PLEASE MEET ME HALFWAY, I'M SO SCARED!!”, then it came to mind she's going through the same thing too. So she met me, along with some neighbors, in the middle of the street. We're standing, trying to figure out what in the 'HELL' is going on and calm one another. Feeling like we're the only people left standing on earth, we formed an united front and grew strong. We all entered back into our own separate homes to do what we could to maintain and make contact with the outside world again. Then comes the news of the plane that went down in PA. Hours, seemed like years. Finally, contacts were being mad and family members were being accounted for, so our minds were somewhat calmed. A few days had past, the the nightmare started again, like I said earlier, I'm a housewife, not by choice. But, I had traveled for many years, along 395 toward Arlington for work and always looked over at the Pentagon and never realizing that a first cousin of mine worked there. SHE WAS MISSING! Her auto was still sitting in the Pentagon's parking lot but our family was saying, “she'll be home soon, she's probably trapped and can't get word to us. AS I SAID BEFORE, God wouldn't put too much on us, that we couldn't handle or bear, another day is passing in fear and heartache. STILL we waited.. Days passed, as we all walked in zombie states. I still woke to fix my husband's breakfast and lunch, hoping he makes it back home to me, from his job but this morning, as my husband was leaving, I noticed him talking to a stranger for a minute or so, my husband entered his truck, but I saw an odd look on my his face as he slowly pulls off. I watch the stranger enter a neighbor's home (one who had stood with us, on 911). The day passed in a blur until my husband returned home. Before I could ask, my husband told me about the stranger that morning. The stranger was a Pastor. The Pastor, told my husband of my neighbor's wife, “What about her?”, I asked. My neighbor's wife had been killed in an auto accident, earlier that morning (September 14).......Days again passed, my husband & I attended my neighbor's wife's military funeral...Any military service is always done with so much honor & control, but this was different....My heart was bursting....More days passed when we finally got word, that part of my cousin's remains had been found among the ruins of the Pentagon, then, the rest of her body (what could be found) was recovered, many days later, after more of the debris was cleared. We watched from afar, New York, we watched from afar the Pentagon, we watched from afar PA....We watched from afar, THE WORLD.....We shed tears viewing the clean-up in New York, Pentagon and PA...Thought of lives taken from this earth, for what reason? Brothers, Sister, Aunts, Uncles, Grandmothers, Grandfathers, Cousins, Nieces, Nephews, Friends, Neighbors, precious Mothers & Fathers...WHY? After the safety issues & clean-up, comes the builders....It's a job that is hard enough physically but mentally, quite another mission to deal with. I know of this, not I personally but remember, the little brother, I spoke of earlier, he's a sheet metal worker, who's company was contracted to work on the Pentagon, “MY HAT'S OFF TO YOU, LITTLE BROTHER!!” He witnessed the destruction, imagine the terror, heartache, sorrow, horror, true lost that he & every last person felt, ENTERING A TIME ZONE OF NO RETURN.....