50 Fun Things to do at Wal-Mart
- Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and standing them at strategic locations.
- Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
- Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
- Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
- Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
- Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
- When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially on thin, narrow aisles.
- Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.
- Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to 10.
- Play with the automatic doors.
- Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!" See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
- While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this crap, anyway?!"
- Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive".
- Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.
- Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
- As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerised and say, "Wow! Magic!"
- Put M&M's on layaway.
- Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
- Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
- Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
- Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.
- Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
- Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "I'm Batman! Come, Robin - to the Batcave!" Run to the nearest open tent.
- TP as much of the store as possible.
- Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
- Play with the calculators so that they all spell words upside down.
- When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
- When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling "Red Rover!"
- Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I.Joes vs. the X-Men or Barbie. Try a whole Matchbox Cars city!
- Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.
- While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.
- Hold indoor shopping cart races.
- Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible."
- Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
- Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
- Set up a Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
- Two words: "Marco Polo"
- "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics.
- In the auto department, practice your Madonna look with various funnels.
-When someone steps away from their car to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
- Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.
- When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"
- Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
