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shanna's blog: ""

created on 01/15/2007  |  http://fubar.com/-/b44913

freedom

FREEDOM!

I had forgotten what it felt like to let my mind be free of you. It had been so long that I constantly thought of you and us. Don’t misunderstand I think of you still but you don’t completely occupy my mind so unfairly like years before. I can now better concentrate on other aspects of my life and not those illusions you allowed me to constantly and falsely dream. Why didn’t you tell me? Why allow me to so unfairly drown in my inaccurate thoughts of us?  Why waste my time when so much time was given already? Im confused,  I feel such a burning hate in my heart, or maybe that’s just the leftover hurt. I truly wish you all the happiness the world can give but I am stuck here wishing that that  happiness was with me. I fear that by my talking about her it pushes you further into her arms but I will just have to endure. Please don’t take this as my trying to tell you what to do in any way shape or form. I just want you fully aware of what I think and feel. I know you will continue to do what you think is best.  It helps ME to get this out on the table.  I don’t believe you two belong together. Im worried she will hurt you. You already tend to keep any deep feelings you have to yourself. If you fall for her and she breaks your heart…who knows what will happen to you. I can only imagine it will further cast you into your shell. I am reminded of a black widow spider. She drawls in her clueless mate with sex then with no mercy devours their very being without so much as a thought. I have seen this happen over and over. She is going to eat you alive. Lead her to feed on someone else, I am afraid she will be the end of you.

sry

TOO MUCH SHIT!!! sry for causing shit...sry for dramatising...sry for letting out my anger...sry for being SO F'IN CONFUSED!! I dont know what to think about anyone anymore...
A 10- to 12-week-old puppy was found Aug. 1 in a recycling bin at 4100 Arkansas. On Aug 3, veterinarians at the hospital gave the pup a 50 percent chance of survival. The puppy, named Magnum, suffered cuts, a broken leg and chemical burns over much of its body. Its front legs had been tied with wire, and wire had been wrapped around its head and neck, with one paw stuck in its mouth. At Heartland Animal Hospital where Magnum was first treated, they've been swamped with calls and cards wishing him a speedy recovery. They've also received more than two thousand dollars in donations that will be given to local animal shelters. Doctor Breault and his staff gave Magnum the best of care, but Magnum's injuries were too extensive so he was taken to an intensive care facility in Kansas City where, sadly, he died in the early morning of Aug 6. If anyone has information on this case, call authorities. Thousands of dollars have been raised for information leading to the arrest of the person or persons responsible. Case Updates Carol Laviolette clutched the gold-painted frame around a photo of a tortured puppy February 2, 2006 as a veterinarian described how that dog, Magnum, climbed to its feet after it was cut free from the wires someone bound it in. Laviolette blotted her tears with a tissue, propping the picture up on her lap for Senate Judiciary Committee members to see. Several others in the packed room at the Capitol also wept quietly as one animal lover after another voiced support for Senate Bill 408, a proposal making animal abuse a felony. Julie Breault, the Bel Aire veterinarian who treated Magnum, broke down as she told the committee how the puppy responded when she cut it free. "HE LICKED MY FACE, " she said. Kansas is one of nine states that does not have felony-level laws for animal abuse. Sen. David Haley, D-Kansas City, has been pushing for tougher penalties since a terrier named Scruffy was burned alive in Kansas City in 1997. But the legislation lacked support. Lawmakers this year have been increasingly pressured to pass tougher penalties after Magnum was found in a Wichita trash bin in August with chemical burns and maggots burrowed in his wounds. The puppy lived for eight days after he was found. No one spoke against tougher penalties for animal cruelty before the committee, which held its first hearing on two proposals Thursday. Committee members are expected to vote on one of the two proposals or a combination of the two. If passed, it would go to the Senate for another vote before moving to the House and, finally, the governor's desk. The alternative to Senate Bill 408 is a proposal drafted by Sen. Phil Journey, R-Haysville. Journey's bill, Senate Bill 402, would create two levels of crime, one for abuse and one for neglect. The first offense for abuse would be a misdemeanor with a minimum 15-day jail stay. People who are convicted under the law would be required to undergo psychological evaluations, submit a DNA sample and register on a violent offenders list. Subsequent offenses are felonies that could lead to prison time. Journey said his bill offers stiffer sentences for serious abuse because it has escalating penalties for subsequent convictions. But he said people are hung up on the word "felony." "It's really symbolism over substance," he said. Senate Bill 408, drafted by the Kansas Humane Society, makes animal abuse a felony on the first offense. Convicts would spend a minimum 30 days in jail, undergo psychological counseling and attend anger management classes. The same penalties would be available for subsequent convictions. Humane Society members and other animal advocates said second convictions are rare and first offense felonies are the only way to send a strong message to people who mistreat animals. "As a society, we have strict laws for humans, but we don't have that for animals," said Sherry Irwin, a member of the Wichita-based Kansas K-9 ResQ Inc. Laviolette, also a member of K-9 ResQ, said she got involved in protecting animals after seeing Magnum in the newspaper. She said she went to Magnum's memorial and grabbed a stack of petitions calling for stronger laws. She set up a table at a Wichita PetSmart and gathered as many signatures as she could. Collectively, more than 73,000 signatures have been gathered. "I'm an animal lover," Laviolette said. "That little dog touched a lot of people." Add Wichita's city government to the list. Kay Johnson, director of environmental services, gave written testimony supporting Senate Bill 408 that says Wichita investigated 760 cases of alleged neglect or abuse in 2005. "This isn't acceptable," she said. Johnson said she supports the idea of escalating penalties included in Journey's bill. But she wants felony charges on the first offense. "It's hard enough to catch them the first time," she said. "When we do, we need to throw the book at them."

i give

fuck it I give up!

....

Have you ever loved someone SO much that you hurt?...not being able to have them makes you feel like your dieing...thats where I am right now. dieing...

...

I guess I only THOUGHT I was done crying...

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Treat me like an angel and I'll be your lil devil! God made men first, because every great master piece needs a sloppy copy tears are unspoken words Before you decide to live by the "early bird" policy, find out whether you're the bird or the worm. love is like a book......if you tear a page, you rip the heart...and have to pay for both! *It’s not the opportunities given…But the chances taken*

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I wish to be your tear, to be born in your eye, live on your cheek, and die on your lips.

.

People Always Say "There Are More Fish In The Sea".. But He Will Always Be My Nemo!
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