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Sharkfin's blog: "Chaos"

created on 10/03/2006  |  http://fubar.com/chaos/b9661
Good Morning. Ever forget a friends phone number, or better yet miss one number and you hear a voice on the other end that you know you do not know. Well the federal fish and game know what that is like now… WASHINGTON (AP)—People calling a federal phone number to order duck stamps are instead greeted by a phone-sex line, due to a printing error the government says would be too expensive to correct. The carrier card for the duck stamp transposes two numbers, so instead of listing 1-800-782-6724, it lists 1-800-872-6724. The first number spells out 1-800-STAMP24, while the second number spells out 1-800-TRAMP24. People calling that second number are welcomed by “Intimate Connections” and enticed by a husky female voice to “talk only to the girls that turn you on,” for $1.99 a minute. Duck stamps, which cost $15 a piece, are required to hunt migratory waterfowl. The government uses nearly all the revenue to purchase waterfowl habitat for the National Wildlife Refuge System. In 2006-2007, the latest figures available, duck stamp purchases brought in nearly $22 million. This year’s stamps, which feature a pair of northern pintail ducks, went on sale July 1 and are good through June 30 of next year. The error will not be corrected until next year’s duck stamps. I have to laugh…because in hunting wild life…hmmm this is one of those oxymoron’s where as wildlife could actually be found in dialing both numbers, anyway I have to get through this segment of the missive or I will never finish it…shoot now where was I? Oh you can tell I was once a hunter…the bag limit for ducks is normally tallied by point system…I wonder what the 1-800-tramp bag limit is? I could actually see in my mind an old man calling for an extra stamp for his wife………Here is how that might have gone. “Henry, who are you calling…?” “Shush woman I am calling the number on the back of this here duck stamp to get an extra one for you…now hush up while I dial…” “HENRY!! I do not need a stamp!” “Hush woman! Ok, they are annnnnnsww…..n’ “(Henry has blank stare into nowhere…) Gladys looks at Henry… and says “Henry… ask them if they have a lavender colored back ground on it… Henry?...Henry?...HENRY!!!!” Henry’s face tells it all…slams the phone down, and says…”Now look what ya done woman! Ya made me dial some hussies house and she wasn’t selling stamps…” Other then Henry and Gladys I have no more to say other then wishing ya’ll a fantabulous weekend…Is fantabulous a word? Holey smokes it must be… A huge hug and many pats…and no stamps studs or muffins were misused in this scenario. Mart
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