I know.... This is 3 back to back to back Cubby blogs that i'm not happy.
Sorry.
Ever have one of those days that you knew would effect the rest of your life?
Be it, when your girl says yes to marrying you. Or the day you find out your
pregnant? I had one of those days today. Some of you know, most dont. I have
back surgery scheduled on July 17th. next Thursday. I have 2 collapsed disks.
Today i had a pre-op appointment. They FORCEFULLY stuck a camera in me. (Don't
ask). And they took a last look at what they have to do. Well, it wasn't good news.
They saw some changes since the last test. Some growth of nerves, and scar tissue.
Doesn't sound like a big deal right? Well, its big enough for them to tell me today
that they no longer want to proceed with the surgery. At the beginning, there
was a very small chance of something to go wrong. That has changed. Now, Dr. Brock
says there is a 30% chance of something going wrong. (Never walking again).
And since i'm now walking, and aren't in severe pain most days, they don't want
to risk it. For first thought i was scared shitless. That has never been talked about before.
I asked what is the next step? I'm in pain everyday, so ALOT more than others. They
will go over everything, before decided. I'll know more Monday.
If they cancel the operation, i'm in for a long life of pain, and medication
everyday. Many days off of work, and being grumpy alot. Also means i'll probably
get hooked on pain medication. Sonny told me about some that are good, and i
asked. My doctor says were not at that point yet. But i'm still very nervous, not because
of the pain. I have been told by someone close to me that i'm a totally different
person when on the pills. I'm grumpy, i'm moody, and just an overall prick. Kinda wished
i was married right now.
So if i seem quiet, or not leaving comments for a few days, you know why. Until Monday
i'll be worried, and probably in a shitty mood. Whats new right? LOL. I'm dying in pain
right now, not from back, but where they put the camera. I'm going to get drunk. Some might
think it's a bad time, but i have fucking deserved it. Back later tonight.
PS, Rate my stash FF's
