petiegirl German beergirl's blog: "when feeling sad"

been very stressed lately( I know no-one will read this) but need to let it out!. Im planning on staying of fubar for while-cant handle the crap, the control thing-telling me what to do. It will be hard because of the sweet few friends I have--BUT--its other ppl--I just cant deal with it--I have soo much to deal with at home in relationship and my teenager now. I feel like Im getting tested again to see how much I can deal with. Guess what-I cant deal with much more!!I try to show my happy side and be strong---guess what?--Im lossing bad!!--Hoping I will find the strength back soon--cause the few sweet friends I have here that really do care about me--well--I will miss you!!

Im having a real hard time trying to keep control of my life. I dont know what to do. Im feeling more sad each day. I try soo hard to be cheery for my sweet friends-but deep down inside me, things are eating me up.I try so hard not to let ppl know--but things are taking over me. Life as I wish it to be-well, it does not exsist. I know that. I watch too much 'girly movies' and wishing for the Cinderella dream. Thats like winning the lottery.To all my sweet friends: if Im not myself at times,PLZ be patient with me.I am really trying my best-honest.I know I get emotoinal at times and I am very very sorry about that!I care alot about you all-I really do. Thats why I come back here all the time.I need you !!If Im not talking to much--plzz dont be mad at me and PLZ dont think I dont care--because I do-VERY MUCH!!!!~