In cold sweat I wake and out gasp for breath,
As I lay trying to shake off dreams of certain death.
Remembering horrifying dreams that I reason away,
Convincing myself that I’ve awakened to a new day.
I reached for the lamp which I know is there,
And in a futile fumble find nothing but air.
I find the lamp yet, for the switch fumble still more,
The same switch that I have turned a thousand times before.
Arms weak and aching, and fingers sore and numb,
Find the switch and turn it again and again, but no light comes.
Giving up on a light, and with eyes that will not adjust,
I do not want to get up, but know that I must.
And so I put my feet on the floor that now seems farther away,
As if now it has become unreachable, unlike yesterday.
With fears of falling my feet touch the firm ground,
And I gingerly scoot them, as I feel my way around.
I stub my toes and bump my knees on obstacles in the dark gloom,
As it seems like days pass before I finally cross the room.
Something falls over and I hear glass break,
And wonder how I am to go on with the steps that I make.
I struggle to reach the door and find a nothing but a wall,
Where I run my sore hands, searching, but find nothing at all.
I know a doorway is there, and rub left and then right,
But can not find the same doorway I passed through last night.
Now fingers bare and bleeding find the wood of a door,
And search for a handle from the top and then down to the floor.
When I do find the handle, I can not get it to turn.
As sweat runs across my palms, and makes my cuts burn.
Twisting, bleeding, and leaning on the door as I do,
Until the door finally yields and I lunge, falling through.
I brace for an impact with the now well lit floor,
As my body flew helpless through the now broken door.
But just before impact, with a gasp and a violent shake,
I sit up in my bed and finally know I am awake.