To be honest, I had this whole big thought on this blog I was going to write. Something that would capture the imagination, and maybe make people ask questions. Then I got a phone call from someone I had not yet prepared myself to speak with. I am sure by my constant silence, she realized I had so much to say, and no way to say any of it. So now I sit here kinda at a loss. My 3 days of drunkeness now having no great stories to write down. It all kinda feels like it never happened. Like I had some really great dream and now that I am feeling the reality of my life course, the events of those days fade into the black. Funny how 15 minutes can change more than a day. When I left on sabbatical, I said I needed to drink some emotions away. Obviously, they are not gone..................I guess in many ways, I still feel for her much more than I want to admit. But that is not a story I want to tell here, and it is not for everyone to hear..............so I guess I leave you with this, out of everything I have ever learned, I have come to see this same lesson taught over and over again: Believe in yourself, trust in yourself, and take pride in yourself. Because when the belief from your partner is gone, and the trust fades away, and the pride they tell you they had is no longer felt..............you will truely see yourself as nothing. One must believe in themselves, so that when all others fail.............one still knows who he/she is.
