heartsRedheaded Geniushearts's blog: "Rohnnda's Ravings"

I am looking for the 'perfect man'. Wait. Did I say 'perfect'? Okay. Maybe that's setting the bar a little high. How about a 'thoughtful, considerate, attentive man'? Hmmmm...still a little tough, you say? Okay...how's this. How about I simplify things. How about just a man. Oh, and breathing would be nice. Here are 10 things I am looking for in a man: 10.Mobility It's a good thing. Men who are, at least ambulatory, are already step ahead. There's so much potential there: potential walks in the park; potential strolls in the moonlight; potential dancing. Ah, the possibilities. 9.Generosity He doesn't need to be rich. He doesn't even need to be flush (although remembering to is always a plus). But the willingness to share, whether it's a meal, his ice cream or his cream cheese pie -- especially his cream cheese pie -- is always a good sign that a he is open to generosity in other areas., resulting in him being a good listener.,or beinga good conversationalist, and just maybe a good... oh, wait. That's a whole 'nuther subject. Plus, if he buys dinner, he might actually have a -- dare I whisper it? -- j. o. b. Which brings us to.... 8.Motivation Motivation to move -- no slugs, thankyouverymuch. There is a difference between a man ,who knows how to relax (ideally while he's rubbing me feet , my shoulders, or my kitty) and a slug. A slug , is one of those guys whose idea of a relaxing afternoon is sprawling on the couch with one leg down the length of the sofa and the other propped on the coffee table, wearing holey sweats, armed with the remote. Don't get me wrong there's nothing wrong with that except for the holey....oophs a hole, okay so I am just as bad on this area. Motivated is a man who sits with me on the couch , perhaps inviting me to snuggle. Motivated is a man who knows how to put down the remote, waiting out the commercial. Motivated is a man who will sit through 'New Dtectives' then patiently, and attentively listen to my commentary, all the while nodding and murmuring things like, "Y'know, I never thought of it like that. You might be right. How is that motivated? That's a man who knows what he wants and, what's more, what it takes to get it. And if you've gotta ask, well then...I'm sorry. 7.Tact Whether it's meeting my mother, meeting my girlfriends, or just hanging out, a man with some tact is a plus. One who knows, on at least a basic level -- even if he's not able to resist the temptation all the time -- that it's not sexy to 'grab and grin' at my mother's dinner table. One who realizes that the third course is NOT necessarily me. One who understands there's a time and place for everything. (Like when we get back to our car.) Plus, if he can answer the question, 'Do I look fat in these?' without making mewant to strangle him, he just might be a keeper. 6.Patience Any man can fake patience. It's no harder than faking an orgasm for a woman. Some are better at it than others though and some have to fake more than others -- what I want is to ferret out the worst. I watch for things like impulsively checking the time. Tapping his fingers while he's waiting for me to finish trying on those incredible shoes I found at the mall. (Everyone who knows me, knows how much I love my shoes.) or him saying: "Aren't you ready yet?" "How much longer is this going to take?" and "Hurry the **** up, already!" But I could just leave him at home....and enjoy the shoe department. 5.Willingness to take direction And not just driving directions (although that counts). A man who can listen and give my suggestions a try. At least seriously consider them. Okay...how about pretend to seriously consider them? 4.Literacy I'm not talking about the complete works of the Shakepeare or "War and Peace." Just a man, who knows that a newspaper is for something other than putting under the car when he changes the oil. A man, who realizes that there's more to television programming than Spike and ESPN. Look at it this way, a man who can string together two coherent sentences is more likely to be able to converse intelligently or to be able to converse at all and more able to hold a job, as well as make a good impression on my family and my friends. Not that I care what my family thinks...no, not me. Still.... 3.The ability to carry his end of the conversation ...or not. Sometimes a nice, comfortable, companionable silence truly is golden. But, at the end of the day (or night) I've got to be able to talk. There are only so many other things we can do to occupy ourselves. but eventually we'll get tired. 2.Common experiences We don't have to be joined at the hip (well, every once in a while might be nice) but it's nice to share interests and experiences. Opposites may attract but they don't always stick. A man, who enjoys some of the same movies, music, books and television might cut down on some of the potential friction. Differences are fine -- they encourage us to grow , to learn and to accept -- but polar opposites? Possible disaster. I am looking for common ground. And finally....Number One with a bullet is..... A nice ass. Yes, I'm kidding. And that brings us to the real number one. A sense of humor. The ability to laugh at himself and with me. I want a man who loves to hear my laugh. A man, who doesn't take himself too seriously. A man, who can look at the world with humor -- and share his view.point humoursly with me. If you can find a man with all these qualitites (and that nice ass wouldn't hurt), PLEASE introduce us, send him my way. I have had it up to my G-string with being single...I am finally ready to find Mr forever instead of my usual Mr. for the moment. Rohnnda Sayri Benavente

Nights of the broken Cherry blossom To me, for my survival On this lovely night, I don't need another broken cherry blossom beneath my father's orchard trees--Yet, here he comes, my mind goes... To the candles in the sky, being fogged by the rain that floods my eyes, nestled on by a pale crescent moon... Like tiny souls, illuminating my way to an unknown heaven that brightens my stay, accenting the darkness, these angelic protectors... Like a fine fleck of golden dust that numbs, that's why in them I trust, the breaking of my cherry blossom. Rohnnda Sayri Benavente Copyright ©2008

The one who makes me smile... Are you out there? Are you somewhere? The one that I have been waiting for all of my life... The one I feel, pumping through my veins... The one I see with my heart made beautiful through love... The one who makes me smile The one who makes me smile The one who gets me and makes feel I really matter... The one who holds my hands and embraces life with me... The one who will shares in all life's ecstasy and sorrows... The one who will be one with me now, and grow old... The one who makes me smile The one who makes me smile Are you out there? Are you somewhere? Rohnnda S. Benavente copyright 2008

Death of the Flesh Life beyond the trees spirit flying with the breeze free, like the butterfly by the light of the moon no longer wrapped in its cocoon A fate we fear never knowing how near closer with each breathe each newly formed wrinkled tears begin to trickle Life time here full of joy, and tears like a flash of light soon we shed our cocoon to fly free over the moon Rohnnda Sayri Benavente Copyright ©2008 rohnnda s benavente

Genesis In our Father's footsteps beautiful lies the world Trees' greenery sways in rhythmic motion accompanies a wayward lark's melody. Nature's harmonious life human breathe escaping earthy bellows caresses Creator's flesh like soft flutters of Monarch's delicate wings gracefully gliding on winds of transparency. Genesis and Revelation, sharing one breath each journey's end, a new beginning. Rohnnda Sayri Benavente Copyright ©2008 rohnnda s benavente

Drought Season I look to my inner center--Who am I? If ever I knew now it escapes me. Once my spirt boundless, no longer exists, Where did I go? When did the river run dry? How did I not see the drought coming? Did the rain stop falling, or did the sand greedily drink the stream inside dry? No longer will tears swell in my eyes Death of my Spirit means I no longer cry. Rohnnda Sayri Benavente Copyright ©2008 rohnnda s benavente

Ah, summer...it seems like the perfect time to nurture your soul. But chances are you can't pack your bags for a three-month stay at a convent or an ashram. The good news is that as schedules change and days lengthen, you can do a few simple things to renew your soul and expand your spiritual horizons--and you don't have to leave town to do it. No passport or vow of silence required. Take advantage of the extra hours of daylight. It's a lot easier to spring out of bed at 6 a.m. when the sun is already up. Leave your bedroom curtains open a bit so that you wake up with the sunrise. Or set your alarm a half-hour earlier. Use that time for meditation and prayer, writing in a journal, or reading a devotional book. Don't expect to do this every day. Just try it one day a week and see if it feels right for you. Enjoy the Night When those daylight hours finally wind down, nurture your spirit under a night sky. Take a blanket in the backyard and look up at the stars. Cuddle up with your kids to look for constellations, invest in a telescope, or just gaze skyward and put your life in perspective. There's nothing like a star-filled sky to fill your soul with awe. Plan a special stargazing adventure the night of August 11 and during the early morning hours of August 12 when the Perseid meteor shower is expected to peak Play with Your Pet If you long for a spiritual summer, start by taking your dog for a walk or watching your cat stretch in the sun. Animals don't spend their lives consumed with worry. They do something humans struggle to do: they live in the moment. Use time with your pet to calm down and appreciate the good things around you right now. Plus, pets often make you laugh, and that's always good for the soul. When you've got kids to entertain or in-laws to visit, families take up a lot of summer's time. But when the normal routines, like school, are over, there's also the possibility of seeing your family members for who they are. If your relatives have special interests, find a way to share them. Think: soccer camp, scrapbooking, needlepoint, favorite action movie. You don't have to love it, just appreciate how much they love it. It's a good way to acknowledge their spirits and nurture yours, too. Eat, Drink, and Pick Berries Summer is the season that's chock full of fresh fruits and vegetables. If you live near a farm, check to see if they'll let you pick your own produce. It's a great way to reconnect with the earth and remind yourself that dinner doesn't actually grow in the frozen food aisle. Plus, fresh fruits and veggies taste so good, you'll want to slow down and eat mindfully. Go Green We're not only talking about recycling. Green is the color of summer, from the leaves and grass to some still, quiet ponds. Remember those bare tree limbs from the winter? Look at them now. Take a moment to remember that seasons change and green returns each year. If your life is feeling less than vibrant, remember it too will change. Revel in the Weather Let's face it, when you're sprinting through freezing rain in January, you're a bit less inclined to spiritual reflection. Now that it's warm, get outside. Kick off your shoes and relax. If you work all day in an air-conditioned office, take a moment on your lunch break to turn your face to the sun and be grateful for the warmth. (If it's really hot, then you'll appreciate the air-conditioning all the more when you get back inside!) Cherish Your Chores Summer is a time of garage sales, car-washing, and grass-cutting. These chores can be less than thrilling, but when you take a step back you can appreciate what you have--the energy to tackle these tasks, the satisfaction of completing them, and the rhythm of life that calls us to busy ourselves with what seems ordinary. And there's something about the smell of freshly cut grass that just refreshes your soul. Lose Vacation Expectations If you have just one or two weeks of vacation, you can stress yourself out thinking how much you should accomplish: visit all relatives within a 500-mile radius or hike, bungee jump, and kayak. Let it go. Realize no trip will be perfect. Focus on things that matter to you. If you're not in a position to plan your dream trip, carve out a few minutes for some soulful solitude--an early morning stroll on the beach or a quick museum visit between family obligations. Take a Mindful Moment We all know that nurturing your soul doesn't require a big bank account or an extended retreat. You have the power to refresh your spirit any time you like. Summer offers a great chance to step outside normal routines and take a deep breath. Acknowledge the warmth, appreciate the light, and know that you can have a spiritual moment any time you like.

In his newest book, "Why is God Laughing?" renowned teacher Deepak Chopra gives a humorous take on spirituality--using a fictional tale of a comedian and his unlikely mentor to show the way back to hope, joy, and even enlightenment. Here are 10 principles for spiritual optimism adapted from the fable that will help you direct your life on a path to joy every single day. 1. The Healthiest Response to Life Is Laughter. This first principle serves as an antidote to fear and sorrow by encouraging you to experience life as joyous....When you feel momentary happiness, or you want to burst out laughing, or you smile for no apparent reason, you are glimpsing eternal reality....In time, these moments of joy will begin to knit together. Instead of the exception, they will become the norm. There is no better way to know that you are growing in God-realization. 2. There Is Always a Reason to Be Grateful. This second principle is an antidote to victimization....The purpose of gratitude is to connect yourself to a higher vision of life....Once you realize that you alone are the projector of reality, you will no longer be dominated by external events. You will correct the mistake that lies at the very root of victimization: a belief that the movie controls you, instead of the other way around. 3. You Belong in the Scheme of the Universe. There's Nothing to Be Afraid Of. You Are Safe. The third principle is the antidote for insecurity....The role assigned to you is right and proper. It is tailor-made for you, for your complete self....The voice of fear tries to convince you that you are a helpless victim of chance. The very opposite is true. At the deepest level, the level of the soul, you are the author of everything that happens to you. 4. Your Soul Cherishes Every Aspect of Your Life. The fourth principle is the antidote for feeling undervalued. It states that your worth is absolute, and that everything that happens to you - whether it feels good at the time or not - is part of a divine plan unfolding from the level of the soul....A person's worth is the value of a soul, which is infinite. Since every event in your life isn't happening just to a person but to a soul, everything in life should be cherished 5. There Is a Plan, and Your Soul Knows What It Is. The fifth principle is the antidote to meaninglessness. It states that your life has a purpose. You determine that purpose at the soul level, and then that purpose unfolds in daily life as part of the divine plan. The more deeply you are connected to the plan, the more powerful it becomes in your life. Ultimately, nothing can stop it. 6. Ecstasy Is the Energy of Spirit. When Life Flows, Energy Is Natural. The sixth principle is the antidote to inertia. It states that infinite energy is available to you. You are a co-creator with God. To claim your creative power, you need only connect with the primal energies that play within you....The kind of energy you can call upon at any given moment depends on your level of consciousness. 7. There Is a Creative Solution to Every Problem. Every Possibility Holds the Promise of Abundance. The seventh principle is the antidote to failure. It tells us that every question includes its own answer. The only reason a problem arises before its solution is that our minds are limited - we think in terms of sequences, of before and after. Outside the narrow boundaries of time, problems and solutions arise at the same instant. 8. Obstacles are Opportunities in Disguise. The eighth principle is the antidote to inflexibility....The secret is to abandon old habits and trust in spontaneity....Whenever you catch yourself reacting in an old, familiar way, simply stop. Don't invent a new reaction; don't fall back on the opposite of what you usually do. Instead, ask for openness. Go inside, be with yourself, and allow the next reaction to come of its own accord. 9. Evolution Leads the Way Through Desire. The ninth principle is the antidote to hypocrisy. It encourages us to act on our genuine desires, because they show the way to real growth. Don't pretend to be better - or other - than you are. Don't fall into the trap of having one face for the world and another to God. Who you really are is exactly who you should be. 10. Freedom Is Letting Go. The tenth principle is the antidote to attachment....If you let go of what isn't real in your life, what's left will be real: what's left is God alone....To be free, you must find a way to let go of all the stuck energy that keeps sending the same old messages....The past is a false guide to the future, and yet it's what most of us rely upon. By letting go of stuck energies, you let go of your past.