Midnight Rose's blog: "poems"

Trying to find The words To say I am sorry I never meant the words i said never meant to break your heart Trying to find the words to say I still care and always will No matter where the roads might lead I will always be your friend Lifes been tough But now I am trying to find the words to say I am sorry
7/26/18

I been trying to find the words to let you know that i care It isnt fair that i have had to live my life without you boys in it it isnt fair that others can hear you laugh that others can hold you when you cry when I can only see you in pictures and in my dreams.Been trying to find the words to say i really miss you and really wish you were here Wish you boys knew how much its killing me inside If only you boys knew how much i loved you both Wish you both the very best and pray that you both still remember me.
7/26/18

I sit back and wonder if things could have been different.If i coulda saved our friendship.If i coulda been a better person.But then i stop and think would it have even mattered My heart is saddened by the things you said.I really thought we had a special friendship.you went your way i went mine. Guess its really over, I guess somethings arent meant to be.It doesnt stop me from wondering If it would have even mattered. 8/8/18

My heart is broken,

the rain is falling.

the thunder crashes down,

and i can no longer here

you calling.

the roses have faded,

i drown in my own ocean of tears,

i run from my own fears.

I am missing you.

the smiles, the laughter.

the words I love you,

faded into the distant skies.

the clouds cover the sun,

 i can still see your face.

time can never erase.

The pain is deep,

i can not sleep.

I am missing you.

where did it go wrong.

and now i wonder if it

even matters.

do you even care that i was

ever there.

I try not to cry,

wishing you were here.

time passes by

maybe its time to say goodbye,

maybe its time to move on.

even though I will always be 

missing you.

The flowers have all withered,

and gone away.

I have gone astray,

once again.

To be tormented by your words.

The sky is dark tonight,

and now your outta sight,

and out of mind.

Like the flowers you to are now gone.

I still wonder why,

you said goodbye,

guess you didnt like the truth.

you have caused so many tears,

cant even look in the mirror.

Played a fool once again,

now time for the pain.

as the rain begins to fall.

I hope your happy,

I hope i cross your mind,

and haunt you for what you did.

but time for me to say goodbye,

cause there is nothing left to say.

You made your choice,

now you can live with the hurt 

you have caused.

So I am saying goodbye,

cause I dont know you anymore.

Like a rose you withered away,

said goodbye.

you tore down the bridge,

and the rain contiues to fall,

cant stop the pain,

like a sky scraper,

i almost made it to the top,

then you tore it down to the ground.

the smiles are all faded.

The memories no longer exist.

For all that i did,

or tried to do, 

you never even cared to say thank you.

but now you say goodbye,

please tell me why.

i walk away with a sigh.

Dont think it even mattered to you.

so not sure it was even worth my time.

To try and keep you smiling,

keep you from crying.

cause i can still hear the hurtful words,

that you said to me.

so i let it be.

and our friendship is now over.

I sit here in silence,

watching the world pass me by,

I look up and sigh.

Do I say goodbye,

or just sit here and cry.

I miss the way things use to be,

wished you could see me.

Just one more time,

so that i know your fine.

you made me laugh,

even after the tears.

you helped me to face my fears,

through the years.

lifes been tough,

the road real rough.

not sure which way to go.

I seem to be lost,

somewhere in time.

I just want to run away,

nothing left for me to say.

So i sit here in silence 

watch the world go by,

i look up and sigh.

Do I say goodbye.

so this is goodbye my friend,

thought it would never end.

You threw me away with your garbage.

Without a reason why,

you was someone i could talk to,

all i can do is cry.

so guess this is goodbye,

i will never know just why.

where did i go wrong.

I walk away with a sigh.

i wish you the best,

you will be in my heart,

but like the stars

you are far away.

So I say goodbye. 

will miss you.

Words left unspoken,

dreams that never come true.

Promises that become lies,

closeness that turns into miles,

Love that becomes hate,

friends that become enemies

when will it ever end.

I loved you my friend.

but like the stars,

you have become so far.

I stair out into the distant sky,

hearing those words goodbye,

so much i want to say,

but they are now words

left unspoken. 

and all the promises are just now lies.

and the dreams well now they will 

never come true.

You left me my friend 

you made the choice.

now i say goodbye.

and the word that i wanted to say

are buried, and continue

to be left unspoken.

Shadows of my heart,

reminding me we are apart.

I love you my friend,

I once prayed that it would never end.

That we would always be walking 

side by side.

Wish you could see the tears i have cried.

I have still tried,

to understand why.

You took my heart and threw it away.

I knew you so well,

or atleast i thought i did.

confused and alone,

where'd i go wrong?

Hoping you will come back,

but knowing in my heart it is over with.

So for the shadows of my heart,

they will stick around.

Until the day you return.

Shadows of my heart.