3XIL3's blog: "Poems"

damn did you fuckers forget hoe to leave comments or something lol leave me some damn comments on my poems cuz it was so easy for me to put my personal shit up for everyone to read lol. tell me what you think.

Just So All Of You Know And Are Made Very Aware All Poems Posted On Here Are Legally Copyrighted. So No Funny Shit Ok. If You Want To Read My Poems Feel Free To That Is Why I Have Them Up. But If You Take Any Of My Poems Without Written Consent From Me Then You Will Be Breaking The Law. Get It Got Good. Oh And Yeah I Will Fucking Sue You Too Lol....Try Me

I Look Up As A Tear Rolls Slowly Down My Cheek I Think Of Better Days I Wounder If I'll Ever Feel The Same Again You Look At Me With Those Eyes I Know So Well Always Serious, So Deep And Insightful As Though You're Always In Control But Not Today, Not Now Now You Look So Scared Like For Once You Don't Have The Answers I Gaze At You Looking Deep Into Those Brown Eyes Hoping To Understand why You've Said Those Things You Did I Wounder For A Moment If This Is A Dream If I Shall Wake In The Morning And Be So Relived When You Look At Me With Confusion I Have Never Seen You Slowly Pull Me Towards You And Wipe The Tears From My Cheek And Tell Me It's Okay.

I Get This Feeling It Comes From Deep Inside. I Get Mad Angry, Wanting To Go And Hide. My Doctor Calls It Depression, My Dad Says Its Just Me. But The Thoughts And Feelings, No One Will Ever Be Able To See. Some Call Me Psycho, Some Call Me Just Weird. It's Like I'm A Different Person, And The Old Me Just Disappeared. I Get Really Edgy, Wanting To Commit Suicide Real Bad. Then I Get A Headache, Followed By A Feeling A Being Sad. I Wish I Could Get Help, I Wish It Would Go Away. Maybe If I Keep Praying Maybe It Will Some Day.

Life Is A Prison Oh God Let Me Out! No One To Listen, To Hear You when You Shout. Climb The walls Of Insanity If You Fall It Doesn't Matter Theres No One To Care. Used To Wish For A Window, To See Birds, Trees, And The Sky, But Your Better Without One Stops You From Aiming Too High. Watching Freedom Is Painful, For Us Locked Away. Seeing Joy, Love, And Happiness, Another Price That We Pay. Strong Is Good, Weak Is Bad, Be It True, Be It False. Your Mind Makes The Choice, And Enforces It Too. Cell Walls Built By Society, With Rules To Adhere. If You Breach The Acctabul, You Had Better Bewear. Hide The Pain, Carry On, Routine Is The Key. Let On That Your Not Okay, You're Just Pretending To Be. Look It Up Inside You, How Badly That It Burns Look Out For That Day, When It All Just Explodes. Living Not But A Shall, Base Functionality Too. But Killing All Else, That Was Uniquely You. So How Do You Grow With A Time bomb Inside? Or How Do You Defuse It Without Destroying It's Ride... You Can't!

I'm Swimming All Alone In A Pool Of Depression And I Feel Like The Depression Is Slowly Pulling Me Under. I Yell For Help But No Ones There To Hear It. I Begin To See The water At eye Level And I Kick And Frail Fighting To Stay Above The water Of My Depression. But The Depression Won't Let Go Of It's Hold On Me And I Slowly Begin To Give In To The Feeling That Lies Below The Water Line, The Water Starts To Full My Lungs That Once Held So Much Left. Yet Now The Depression Allows The Murky Water To Replace That. I Know That This Path Doesn't Lead To Happiness But Why Doesn't Someone Grab My Hand Pull Me From This Grasp Of My Depression? Because No One Knows I Stand At the Boundary. The Boundary Between Light And Dark So I Give Into The Thing That Holds Me. All Of The Strength And All Of My Courage That I Once Held In My Heart Can't Save Me From My Depression, So I Slowly Slip Below The World Of Conscientiousness Undetected By The Occupants Of That World. I Don't Want To Fight Anymore I've Given Into My Depression.

There Is A Great Deal Of Depression That Has Overtaken My Soul, It Floods Within, Into Every Inch That Makes Me Whole. I Wonder And Worry Through Each And Every Thought Of The Day. What Is To Come, To My Dismay? As A Flood Of Tears Pour Out Of Me In All My Expressions, More And More Comes, More And More Depression. I Try To Assure Myself Everything Is Okay But Who Am I Fooling? I Burst Into A Spirit Of Rage. I Have Questions, And There Are No Answers. But I'm Afraid And Much Too Weak, When This Is How I Feel, There's No Wrong Nor Right. But As I Battle with Myself, I Always Lose The Fight. I Feel Intimidated Sometimes By Others, But As I Said "This Is How I Feel." The Pain Is So Very Real. I Lose Control, My Thoughts Go Wild. And Here I Am Only A Child If Only You Knew What I Fought, If Only You Knew What I Thought. I Need Mt thought Held Captive!

Another Night Filled With Sad Despair Sitting Here On My Own Tears Streaming Down My Pale Face Inside The Pain Has Grown. Another Argument, Another Fought I Sit There And Take It All Haven't Got The Strength To Fight Back Now I'm Slumped In This Silent Fall. Another Poem Full Of The Emotions I Can't Bare To Talk About You Would Never Listen To Me You Only Scream And Shout. Another Teardrop Falling Down My Already Watered Cheek Telling The world Of My Pain Inside The words I Cannot Speak. Another Memory Of The Past The Abuse, But I Know Theres More To Come Flashbacks Haunt Me To This day The Nightmares, Too Won't stop. Another Scar Upon My Wrist A Scar That Fails To Heal Blood Has Poured So Many Nights To Show That I'm Still Real. Another Teardrop Slipping Away Falling On To The Floor Can't Stop The Pain even Though I Try Even Though I'm battered And Sore. Another thought Of You Up There That day I Said Goodbye Still I Can't believe You're Really Gone I Really don't Know Why. Another Memory, Of Us Together Not So Long Ago If Only I Could Have Stoped Your Fall If Only I'd Known. Another Teardrop, They Won't Stop Now Now That I've Thought Of you Now That I've remembered You I Don't Know What To Do. I Don't Know How To Cope With This Night... After... Night Pain And Tears Only Seems To Grow Even Though I Put Up A Fight. Even Though I Try My Very Best My world Keeps Crashing Down All My strength Is Laid To Rest And So I Wear This Frown. I Don't Know How Long I Can Last In This Daily Fall I Wish Someone Would Give Me Strength And Help Me To Stand Tall. But I Guess Until That Day Arrives I'll Stay Here And I'll Fight Then Maybe That Day When Hope Appears Maybe Then I'll See Some Light.

I Lay On The Floor Just Staring At The Ceiling Pain, Hate, And Sadness Are What I'm Feeling I'm Blamed For Things I Did Not Do To Me This Is Nothing New I Cut My wrists And Watch The Blood Flow All Of This You'll Never Know You Have No Clue what I Go Through You Don't Even Know What To Do I Lay Here Thinking About My Life Must The Pain End With The Knife A Quick Slash Here A Crimson Line There My Arms Are Covered With These Lines I can't Remember Any Good Times Happiness, I Cannot Find Can't You even Try To Be Kind? I Go Through This Pain Every Day Suddenly My Life Starts To Fray My Life Is Broken And Torn My Biggest Mistake Was Being Born I'm Emotionally Abused I Feel I'm Nothing But Used I'm Unwanted And Not Cared To Love Me Was Like A dare My Pain Will Never End Suicide Is My Only Friend I Lay Here dying I Start Crying Once I reach The Heavens Above I'll feel Cared And Loved Until Then I Lay Here Waiting As My Life Is Slowly Fading As I Die You Find Me And Wounder "Why?" Theres A Note On My Bed You Picked It Up And It Read: "I'm Sorry For Dying I Rather Be Dead Then Alwyas Crying. I Know I Committed Suicide I'll Be Surprised If You wonder Why. I Did It Because Of You And All The Pain You Put Me through I was Blamed For Everything That Went Bad Happiness I Never Had Everything I Go Through And All The Things I'm Feeling, Can't You Realize I'm Just A Human? I Guess You Can't And Probably Won't Im Put Through So Much Blame I'll Be Surprised If You Even Know My Name If You Don't I'm Not Surprised My Soul Is Where My Pain Lies I'm Not sorry For What I Did I'm Sick Of Being Treated Like A Kid Goodbye Forever." That's The End Of My Letter At The Bottom It's Signed With A Razor I Know I Did The World A Favor Goodbye To You And Goodbye My Life Happiness Came when I Used This Knife The Pain Would Never End Death Is Now My New Friend It's Not Suicide, More Like A Homicide You Drove Me To The Reason Why I Died I Hope You Feel The Pain I Went Through I'm Now Dead Because Of You

One night on graveyard of the angels, I was walking, that night I saw an angel, saw her crying, her wings broken, torn, hurt, she was dying... Angel, such an beauty, fallen from the heavens garden, I watched her soul escape in the little tears, to see her there, so deadly wounded, it was burden, she was lost, fallen, dying, filled with fears... She was lying on the cold white marble plate, to help her I tried, but I was too late, in the pool of blood, to die, was her fate... Angel stared me, I heard her silent cries, pale little form on pool of so red blood, angel, so fragile thing with beautiful eyes, in rage I cried, next who dies will be god... I took angel on my arms, kissed, loved, hold her near, gave my warmth, words of hope I whispered in her ear, god will pay for this crime, my love, do not fear...