Cha0tic Drag0n RL Married to SuzyQ61's blog: "poems"

An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, "Seven Points." His wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was that?" The old man replied, "It's fart football." A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says "Touchdown, tie score." After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says, "Aha. I'm ahead 14 to 7" Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says, "Touchdown, tie score." Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, "Field goal, I lead 17 to 14." Now the pressure is on the old man. He refuses to get beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard. Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he's got, and accidentally poops in the bed. The wife says, "What the hell was that?" The old man says, "Half time, switch sides...............

These two guys meet after not having seen each other for many many years. First guy asks the second guy, "How have things been going?" The second guy speaking very s..l..o..w.. l..y.. tells the first guy, "I w..a..s.. a..l..m..o.. s..t m..a..r..r.. i..e..d." The first guy says in amazement, "Hey, you don't stutter any more." The answer comes, " Y..e..s, I w..e..n..t t..o a d..o..c..t.. o.r.. a..n..d h..e t..o..l..d m..e t..h..a..t i..f I s..p..e..a.. k.. s..l..o..w.. l..y I w..i..l..l n..o..t s..t..u..t.. t..e..r." The first friend congratulates him and than asks again about how he was almost married. "W..e..l..l m..y f..i..a..n.. c..e..e a..n..d I w..e..r..e s..i...t..t. .i..n..g. . o..n h..e..r p..o...r..c. .h a..n..d t..h..e d..o..g w..a..s s..c..r..a.. t..c..h. . i..n..g h..i..s b..a..c..k a..n..d I t..o..l..d h..e..r t..h..a..t w..h..e..n w..e a..r..e m..a..r..r.. i..e..d s..h..e c..a..n d..o t..h..a..t f..o..r m.e a..n..d s..h..e t..h..r..e.. w t..h..e r..i..n..g i..n m..y f..a..c..e.. " "Why should she throw the ring in your face for that?" asks the first friend. " W..e..l..l I s..p..e..a.. k s..o s..l..o..w. l..y, t..h..a..t b..y t..h..e t..i..m..e s..h..e l..o..o..k.. e..d.. a..t t..h..e d..o..g, h..e w..a..s l..i..c..k.. i..n..g h..i..s b..a..l..l.. s"

A cop stops a Harley for traveling faster than the posted speed limit. So he asks the biker his name. "Fred," he replies. "Fred what?" the officer asks. "Just Fred," the man responds. The officer is in a good mood and thinks he might just give the biker a break and, write him out a warning instead of a ticket. The officer then presses him for the last name. The man tells him that he used to have a last name but lost it. The officer thinks that he has a nut case on his hands but plays along with it. "Tell me, Fred, how did you lose your last name?" The biker replies, "It's a long story, so stay with me." "I was born Fred Dingaling. I know - a funny last name. The kids used to tease me all the time. So I stayed to myself, studied hard and got good grades. When I got older I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, residency, and finally got my degree, so I was Fred Dingaling, MD." "After a while I got bored being a doctor, so I decided to go back to school. Dentistry was my dream! Got all the way through school, got my degree, so then I was Fred Dingaling, MD, DDS. Got bored doing dentistry, so I started fooling around with my assistant and she gave me VD." "So now I was Fred Dingaling, MD, DDS, with VD. Well, the ADA found out about the VD, so they took away my DDS. Then I was Fred Dingaling, MD, with VD. "Then the AMA found out about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away my MD leaving me as Fred Dingaling with VD. "Then the VD took away my Dingaling, so now I am just Fred." The officer walked away in tears, laughing...

Continuous Togetherness by Hope Remember if others leave True friendships stay Being there for each other Each step of the way In continued togetherness Strength they restore There with a helping hand Forever giving more Friends which to count on Are angels in disguise By bonding heart to heart Their love never dies Friends upon life's journey Giving hearts sincerity For having forever friends Means so much to me

Family Blessings by Curt Steinebach Sometimes it's so overwhelming Our life is at such a fast pace I miss the time to reflect As we run kids from place to place. A chance to take a short breath A moment to pause and ponder On the blessings I've received And all of God's gifts of wonder. As I look back at it all It's so easy for me to see How great my life really is There is no place I'd rather be. If given the chance to change The path I've taken in my life I'd leave everything as is For I need my children and wife. For my kids are the reason I smile with pride every day My wife is my saving grace She loves me and shows me the way. The greatest wish of my life is to give back what they've given me For my kids to know they are loved And to love my wife for eternity.

A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He being a devoted husband protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good time being spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain and, as it was still early, she decided to go the party. Since her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him. She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could, and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new stuff that had just arrived. She let him go as far as he wished; naturally, since he was her husband. Finally, he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had a little bang. Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away, went home, put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior. She was sitting up reading when he came in, and she asked what kind of a time he had. He said: - Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there. Did you dance much? I'll tell you, I n ever even danced one dance. When I got there,I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But you're not going to believe what happened to the guy I loaned my costume to......."

She is my dream within a dream The warmth and security to comfort my heart. Her love is a song which beats to my soul as if we were one, Played from the strings of a harp. Her passion felt through her lips and seen through her eyes. Her beauty so deep, seen beyond the naked eye. Her touch is so warm and gentle, that Her love, fulfills my hearts desires inside. She caresses my mind and body, With more then mere touch. Her true love brings me, happiness and joy. Into my life that I enjoy and crave so much. Her love like, that of a rose petal in a winter morn, crisp and percise. Our love is so beautiful yet so rare I shall capture every moment, that We may have together. For when we apart, my heart yearns to be beside her. For she has become, My one and only True Love. written by me.....cha0tic dragon

Mindscape Mantra by Esssence interesting how it all begins in the deepest recesses of my mind slowly gaining form and feeling until it bursts forth in the depths of my physical being and there are tingles moistness appears and innate archetypal scripts play out their ancient interpretations of our sexual urges and needs i see you and feel you and want you you are ready for me and your sensual smile tells me this time will fill me with all you have and all you are and all you can and need to share with me your eyes pierce the sanctity of my soul and i can but give you what you wish with intensity and sensuality and a fierceness that surprises us both the storm which engulfs us carries us away and we lose ourselves and somewhere on the other side we will reappear exhausted and spent to go back to our dreamscape that contains our thoughts before they become our reality and our mantra is touch me, feel me, love me need me

Unbridled Passion by Suzette Pollard I feel the warmth of your hand as it covers mine Your moist, warm breath on my neck A finger tracing my breast I begin to feel shivers erupt in my body Uncontrollably I reach for you Aching for your touch Anticipating your every move Willing you to ravage me with your mouth With uninhibited passion as we become one Our bodies mold together so perfectly Your lips softly brushing mine Making their way on a downward journey I tremble as they reach their destination Your name tumbling from my lips My want and need for you overpowering me Your scent intoxicates me We lie, spent, in each others arms Holding you close, hearts beating as one Love so strong, so pure, so right

The Hallway by BrwnBeauty She stood at the door her back to the hall He came towards her making no sound at all. Looking left and looking right He found not a soul in sight. He came up behind her and lifted her skirt She drew in a breath because she smelled his shirt. Leaning back into his chest She smiled as the hand found her breast. She did not turn for she knew it was him He grinned and continued to caress her skin. Stroking her slowly helping her rise He inhaled the scent coming from her thighs. He slipped his fingers deeper in She groaned as her head pressed into his chin. Feeling the wetness surrounding his hand She felt so weak like she could not stand. She heard the cart coming down the hall He didn't stop pressed them closer to the wall. Silently cries came from between clinched lips He lifted his leg and shifted her hip. He whispered her name gently in her ear She thought she'd faint as the cart came nearer. Drawing abreast of the coupled pair She felt the towel thrown in the air. She concentrated on the crest that was rising He wanted to taste of her sweet climaxing. Bringing her to the place she needed to be He delayed the feast of this delicacy. He felt her shudder and the sweet release She let herself go into sweet ecstasy. Slipping the card key back into the door. They fell in the room, and continued on the floor.